Crafting an old-age persona

[Mock Turtle]

Isn't this what is expected of us as we age? Like becoming more religious (or even religious at all), getting more grumpy (but not in my nature really), and becoming more right-wing (probably long overdue but again not really going to happen). For the the religious aspect, it seems I lack any motivation or incentives for doing so - mainly because I just can't accept the writings from the past that speak of anything other than what seems reasonable to me anyway, so why would they affect me at all? The grumpiness aspect has been proven to be a lie (for most oldies), in that people tend to be happier as they get older rather than more grumpy - we even tolerate and make light of the many disadvantages of ageing - knowing that the rest will probably have to endure them too, or have even worse. The right-wing position has never made any sense to me so that is unlikely to change.

So old age can go suck a duck!

 

[exchemist]

Isn't this what is expected of us as we age? Like becoming more religious (or even religious at all), getting more grumpy (but not in my nature really), and becoming more right-wing (probably long overdue but again not really going to happen). For the the religious aspect, it seems I lack any motivation or incentives for doing so - mainly because I just can't accept the writings from the past that speak of anything other than what seems reasonable to me anyway, so why would they affect me at all? The grumpiness aspect has been proven to be a lie (for most oldies), in that people tend to be happier as they get older rather than more grumpy - we even tolerate and make light of the many disadvantages of ageing - knowing that the rest will probably have to endure them too, or have even worse. The right-wing position has never made any sense to me so that is unlikely to change.

So old age can go suck a duck!

I'm not so sure about the grumpiness. For me, the self-mutilating idiocy of Brexit has ensured grumpiness - but also a new, deep and probably unalterable loathing for the Tory party, so I agree about the right-wing stereotype being inaccurate.

As for religion, I have rather returned to it, but that's because I was brought up with it so it's an old friend, even if I was estranged from it for a while.

 

[halbhh]

Isn't this what is expected of us as we age? Like becoming more religious (or even religious at all), getting more grumpy (but not in my nature really), and becoming more right-wing (probably long overdue but again not really going to happen). For the the religious aspect, it seems I lack any motivation or incentives for doing so - mainly because I just can't accept the writings from the past that speak of anything other than what seems reasonable to me anyway, so why would they affect me at all? The grumpiness aspect has been proven to be a lie (for most oldies), in that people tend to be happier as they get older rather than more grumpy - we even tolerate and make light of the many disadvantages of ageing - knowing that the rest will probably have to endure them too, or have even worse. The right-wing position has never made any sense to me so that is unlikely to change.

So old age can go suck a duck!

Isn't it interesting how many people get happier in old age, so that 75 yr olds are almost as happy as when they were children. One thing we could figure is that seeing by their 50s that all the pursuit and effort for things like more status and wealth either didn't happen or if they did turn out to be not so good as imagined (for most, though for some it's temporary relief (a few years) from childhood feelings of being impoverished or invisible or such) but in time are experienced even when had to be of no enduring value -- and so in that middle age failure to attain that illusory nirvana, the unhappy feelings many appear to have during their 50s. Which are relieved later in time by the 70s since it's game-over for those older people on such things, water under the bridge -- they are free of those self kept demons.

Still, wouldn't it be interesting though to know what else the happier people believe?

But that they simply are old and letting go of caring about a lot of empty stuff of no true value, such as extra status or extra wealth, is already enough to get back close to that childhood level of happiness.

 

[Mock Turtle]

I'm not so sure about the grumpiness. For me, the self-mutilating idiocy of Brexit has ensured grumpiness - but also a new, deep and probably unalterable loathing for the Tory party, so I agree about the right-wing stereotype being inaccurate.

As for religion, I have rather returned to it, but that's because I was brought up with it so it's an old friend, even if I was estranged from it for a while.

I came across an article some time back but this will do:

The One Feeling That Gets Better With Old Age

And although it does seem to be a fact that the young are more likely to be left-wing inclined and those older to be more right-wing, it seems that some of us just don't learn. Brexit just makes me sad not grumpy.

I suspect if one is not going to get into religion then that is it, and I've probably had enough experiences to push me into such but it just hasn't happened.

 

[BSM1]

Isn't it interesting how many people get happier in old age, so that 75 yr olds are almost as happy as when they were children. One thing we could figure is that seeing by their 50s that all the pursuit and effort for things like more status and wealth either didn't happen or if they did turn out to be not so good as imagined (for most, though for some it's temporary relief (a few years) from childhood feelings of being impoverished or invisible or such) but in time are experienced even when had to be of no enduring value -- and so in that middle age failure to attain that illusory nirvana, the unhappy feelings many appear to have during their 50s. Which are relieved later in time by the 70s since it's game-over for those older people on such things, water under the bridge -- they are free of those self kept demons.

Still, wouldn't it be interesting though to know what else the happier people believe?

But that they simply are old and letting go of caring about a lot of empty stuff of no true value, such as extra status or extra wealth, is already enough to get back close to that childhood level of happiness.

Forty was my best year because I realize that I had nothing left to prove to anyone. Now here I am in my seventies and playing in my first blues/rock band (our lead guitar player is 22). Pbbbtff! Age is just a number.

 

[sun rise]

The first part of this Robert Browning statement are oft quoted but the last bit left off but here's the entire statement.

“Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which the first was made. Our times are in his hand who saith, 'A whole I planned, youth shows but half; Trust God: See all, nor be afraid!”

 

[King Phenomenon]

Isn't this what is expected of us as we age? Like becoming more religious (or even religious at all), getting more grumpy (but not in my nature really), and becoming more right-wing (probably long overdue but again not really going to happen). For the the religious aspect, it seems I lack any motivation or incentives for doing so - mainly because I just can't accept the writings from the past that speak of anything other than what seems reasonable to me anyway, so why would they affect me at all? The grumpiness aspect has been proven to be a lie (for most oldies), in that people tend to be happier as they get older rather than more grumpy - we even tolerate and make light of the many disadvantages of ageing - knowing that the rest will probably have to endure them too, or have even worse. The right-wing position has never made any sense to me so that is unlikely to change.

So old age can go suck a duck!

Will you accept the reasonable writings from the past so you haven't lost all incentive

 

[Nakosis]

Isn't this what is expected of us as we age? Like becoming more religious (or even religious at all), getting more grumpy (but not in my nature really), and becoming more right-wing (probably long overdue but again not really going to happen). For the the religious aspect, it seems I lack any motivation or incentives for doing so - mainly because I just can't accept the writings from the past that speak of anything other than what seems reasonable to me anyway, so why would they affect me at all? The grumpiness aspect has been proven to be a lie (for most oldies), in that people tend to be happier as they get older rather than more grumpy - we even tolerate and make light of the many disadvantages of ageing - knowing that the rest will probably have to endure them too, or have even worse. The right-wing position has never made any sense to me so that is unlikely to change.

So old age can go suck a duck!

To me, it is more to these crusades that motivate the youth. Setting aside the idea that we have a responsibility to change or even thinking we can change the world. That along with increasing physical limitations. You can remain as aggressive or as assertive as you want but as the youth take positions of power they will assume to know better just as we did. So eventually they will stop listening. If you have managed to gather money or power folks will listen to whatever minimum level to remain in your good graces. I suspect the folk who fight the progression of age are the ones who become grumpy.

The happy ones manage to let go of feeling responsible to fix the world. I think my grandmother became religious because it gave her a responsibility/duty that was still acceptable to society for old folks. Lots of volunteer work.

So either fight the takeover from the youth and become grumpy or accept it find and your happy place.

 

[Polymath257]

I learned at an early age that I could die at any time (allergies and asthma almost killed me a number of times). So the fear of death has never been a big issue for me.

As I grow older, I care what other people think less and less. And that is great freedom. Being able to tell Mrs. Grundy to go fly a kite is very liberating. I think that might be the best advantage of old age: everyone who cared what you do has already left the stage.

I also make enough money to be comfortable, but not so much that I can be complacent. i have a job that I like, but that offers challenges and makes me feel somewhat useful.

And, through the miracles of modern medicine, I am healthier now than I was in my 20's and 30's. Each decade is a bit better than the last. I'm still a ways away from my 70's, but i can see the possibility from here.

 

[Rational Agnostic]

I'm not so sure about the grumpiness. For me, the self-mutilating idiocy of Brexit has ensured grumpiness - but also a new, deep and probably unalterable loathing for the Tory party, so I agree about the right-wing stereotype being inaccurate.

As for religion, I have rather returned to it, but that's because I was brought up with it so it's an old friend, even if I was estranged from it for a while.

Just curious--do you actually believe the religion or just practice it as a cultural thing to go along with the rest of your friends/family? I'm not trying to be intrusive or anything--just curious because you label yourself as "culturally" Catholic.

 

[Thief]

I really don't like the way my hair is thinning out

makes me grumpy

 

[Mock Turtle]

Will you accept the reasonable writings from the past so you haven't lost all incentive

For me it is just not that important. I'm more interested in how people are likely to behave based on evidence and current knowledge, and because of such I tend to have an interest more in subjects like psychology and related areas. As you might know, I'm a bit agnostic as to any God (mostly not believing in such) such that no amount of looking at old texts is likely to persuade me otherwise - especially when much that I have read just looks like it was written for the times rather than being pronouncements for all time.

I have a lot of agreement with much that is taught by most religions, and that for me are just the core values that would be there without religions, so that is why I seem to lack any incentives. And it's all the extra bits of the various religious beliefs that seems to cause many issues when the core values are much the same. I have looked at most of the major faiths and their tenets, but one can't escape the fact that if I don't really believe in any God then it follows that religious beliefs don't make any sense either.

 

[Mock Turtle]

To me, it is more to these crusades that motivate the youth. Setting aside the idea that we have a responsibility to change or even thinking we can change the world. That along with increasing physical limitations. You can remain as aggressive or as assertive as you want but as the youth take positions of power they will assume to know better just as we did. So eventually they will stop listening. If you have managed to gather money or power folks will listen to whatever minimum level to remain in your good graces. I suspect the folk who fight the progression of age are the ones who become grumpy.

The happy ones manage to let go of feeling responsible to fix the world. I think my grandmother became religious because it gave her a responsibility/duty that was still acceptable to society for old folks. Lots of volunteer work.

So either fight the takeover from the youth and become grumpy or accept it find and your happy place.

I think perhaps many do become grumpy because they see a separation between themselves (and their generation) and those younger, and it hardly helps when we have one particular generation blaming another (usually those older, like Boomers) for any perceived ills - and obviously the reverse. I don't do this and I think each generation just faces different challenges and shouldn't blame previous generations for anything in particular, since often half will have voted differently, or blame any newer generation for anything new that enters our lives. We all tend to face different challenges and as individuals don't have a lot of control over such.

 

[Mock Turtle]

I really don't like the way my hair is thinning out

makes me grumpy

Me too. If I had to swap a little health for my hair back then I probably would - irrational as it might be.

 

[exchemist]

Just curious--do you actually believe the religion or just practice it as a cultural thing to go along with the rest of your friends/family? I'm not trying to be intrusive or anything--just curious because you label yourself as "culturally" Catholic.

I'm agnostic, really. I lost my faith when I was in the Middle East and exposed to other religions. It seemed absurd that mine or any other had a unique claim to truth and it began to seem likely that religion is a probably a universal product of the human psyche. However, I had a good experience being brought up in the Catholic church and never lost my affection or respect for its teaching, traditions and rituals - and for the art it has inspired, especially perhaps musical.

When our son was born, my (French) wife and I discussed whether to bring him up with Catholicism or without and decided on the whole it was better to bring him up with it. That way, at least, he would understand Christianity when so many people nowadays don't, and he would thereby understand the roots of European culture and have full access to its artistic heritage. (As an American, you may not fully appreciate how much history is all around us in Europe.) So we started taking him to church. I joined the choir and got quite involved with it. I joined another choir when we moved to the Netherlands and we used to go to the sung Latin mass, since I didn't understand Dutch. Then my wife got cancer, and being aware her time was limited, it became rather calming to feel a sense of solidarity with the humanity of Christendom in past centuries, which we got from the ceremony and thousand year old plainchant of the Latin mass.

I find attending mass on Sunday and listening to the gospel, and often (not always ) the sermon, always teaches me or reminds me of something helpful about how to live my life. It provides a point in the week to stand back a bit, regain a sense of proportion and spend an hour in another, more timeless, world. I meet a quite different cross-section of the community from my daily comfortable middle-class bubble. And I enjoy the singing.

So there you have it. I suspect my reasons for religious observance are not far from those of very many people, actually. If you are not brought up with it, these reasons may seem inadequate, but there we are.

As it happens, my son has decided he doesn't believe in it and has stopped coming to church now. But he wants to study history at university, as his grandfather did. And he can look at a painting, or the frieze above a church door, or listen to a piece of religious music, and understand what it portrays.

 

[Revoltingest]

Growing older is about doing what you want.
A big part of that is steering one's wants.

 

[Thief]

Growing older is about doing what you want.
A big part of that is steering one's wants.

better yet......go DO want you want while you still CAN...!!!

don't wait til your spine stiffens to be a black belt

hehehehe

 

[BSM1]

better yet......go DO want you want while you still CAN...!!!

don't wait til your spine stiffens to be a black belt

hehehehe

Shamelessly self-promoting case in point here...

 

[Revoltingest]

better yet......go DO want you want while you still CAN...!!!

don't wait til your spine stiffens to be a black belt

hehehehe

I'm not postponing slacking off until I become decrepit.
Do'n it now, & live'n the dream!

 

[Thief]

atta boy.....you old fart