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Poll

Is there anything wrong with loving yourself more than others?

  • 1. Absolutely

    Votes: 6 28.6%
  • 2. No way

    Votes: 6 28.6%
  • 3. I don’t know.

    Votes: 2 9.5%
  • 4. Not if the others are mean.

    Votes: 1 4.8%
  • 5. I have another answer.

    Votes: 6 28.6%

  • Total voters
    21

Vee

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
Depends. I think you should love others enough to want to protect them from being hurt, but you should also love yourself enough not to let others hurt you.
 

Jesster

Friendly skeptic
Premium Member
Not at all. I used to waste my time just caring about others at the expense of myself. Eventually there wasn't much of me left. Now I make sure to take care of myself first so there's still some of me left when I need to take care of others.
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
The only way you can truly love another is to be able to love yourself first.
 

Nakosis

Non-Binary Physicalist
Premium Member
is there anything wrong with loving yourself more than others?

Yes, because the self you identify with is probably not the real "self". Being attached to this false self can cause you to suffer.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
is there anything wrong with loving yourself more than others?

No. If you love others more than yourself you have a lot of weighed empathy for others and its exhausting carrying others emotions and disregarding your own.

If anything, its both ways. Helping others helps you. Helping yourself lets you be able to help others. One dharma talk mentioned it like this: we boddhisattvas take vows to help others as a soul means of achieving buddhahood for ourselves. It makes you let go of the ego part of you to the unconditional love. So the Act of helping others (thinking of others) is the act of thinking of yourselves.

The nun says that sounds kinda selfish but, she says, if you realize you cant change other people and no reservations, it is really all about you.

Depends on how you see it.
 

Hockeycowboy

Witness for Jehovah
Premium Member
is there anything wrong with loving yourself more than others?

Wouldn’t that tend to make one selfish?

You’d never want to do anything for anybody.

Philippians 2:3-4

That’s not saying that we shouldn’t love ourselves; we need self-worth, but not to the exclusion of being concerned for others.
 

SalixIncendium

अग्निविलोवनन्दः
Staff member
Premium Member
is there anything wrong with loving yourself more than others?

My answer to your poll is highly dependent on how you are defining 'self' and how you are defining 'love.' Therefore I voted that "I have another answer."

Using my own personal definitions, love of ego self over others equates to narcissism. However, I don't make a distinction between love of higher Self and love of others.


Edited for clarity
 
Last edited:

Deeje

Avid Bible Student
Premium Member
@Gerry I would vote to "think of others before self within reason".

What was the example that Jesus set...that is always a good place to start....

On Jesus’ last night on earth, he was with his apostles having a meal; Jesus got up and took off his outer garments. He tied a towel around his waist and put water into a basin. Then he began to wash the feet of the disciples and to dry them off with the towel. When he had finished, he asked.... “Do you know what I have done to you?. . . “If I, although Lord and Teacher, washed your feet, you also ought to wash the feet of one another. For I set the pattern for you, that, just as I did to you, you should do also.” (John 13:3-15) With this humble act, Jesus taught his apostles a lesson that they would not forget and that would encourage them to be humble later on. Here was the perfect son of God, the second most important personage in the Universe, humbly washing the feet of his own imperfect students.

If he did not think more of himself than them, why should we?

Then we have the contrast in the example of satan who is not humble at all and engenders his prideful and arrogant attitude in others. "Me first" has become the motto of modern times, but it isn't what Jesus taught. He said that "love" was to identify his disciples, (John 13:35) but it was the self-sacrificing kind that he displayed and advocated. (John 15:13)

The parable of the Good Samaritan highlighted what that meant.....going that extra bit to help someone in need without concern for self. I think of it like a person who stands in front of a cherished family member to protect them from an assailant.....or who grabs a person out of the way of a speeding car knowing that doing so might get themselves killed.

I like what Paul said in Romans 12:3..."For through the undeserved kindness given to me, I tell everyone there among you not to think more of himself than it is necessary to think, but to think so as to have a sound mind, each one as God has given to him a measure of faith."

So, it is necessary to think something of ourselves but there are obviously limits, and a sound mind will set those limits.

There was a song decades ago by George Benson called "the Greatest Love of All" and in it he said that "leaning to love yourself is the greatest love of all".....he was right, but for the reason that Paul outlined above. It IS necessary to love yourself but not to the exclusion of others...as Paul said in Philippians 2:3-4...."Do nothing out of contentiousness or out of egotism, but with humility consider others superior to you, 4 as you look out not only for your own interests, but also for the interests of others."

We must have some self interest in order to have the will to be interested in anyone else...even God.
 
Last edited:

BSM1

What? Me worry?
@Gerry I would vote to "think of others before self within reason".

What was the example that Jesus set...that is always a good place to start....

On Jesus’ last night on earth, he was with his apostles having a meal; Jesus got up and took off his outer garments. He tied a towel around his waist and put water into a basin. Then he began to wash the feet of the disciples and to dry them off with the towel. When he had finished, he asked.... “Do you know what I have done to you?. . . “If I, although Lord and Teacher, washed your feet, you also ought to wash the feet of one another. For I set the pattern for you, that, just as I did to you, you should do also.” (John 13:3-15) With this humble act, Jesus taught his apostles a lesson that they would not forget and that would encourage them to be humble later on. Here was the perfect son of God, the second most important personage in the Universe, humbly washing the feet of his own imperfect students.

If he did not think more of himself than them, why should we?

Then we have the contrast in the example of satan who is not humble at all and engenders his prideful and arrogant attitude in others. "Me first" has become the motto of modern times, but it isn't what Jesus taught. He said that "love" was to identify his disciples, (John 13:35) but it was the self-sacrificing kind that he displayed and advocated. (John 15:13)

The parable of the Good Samaritan highlighted what that meant.....going that extra bit to help someone in need without concern for self. I think of it like a person who stands in front of a cherished family member to protect them from an assailant.....or who grabs a person out of the way of a speeding car knowing that doing so might get themselves killed.

I like what Paul said..."For through the undeserved kindness given to me, I tell everyone there among you not to think more of himself than it is necessary to think, but to think so as to have a sound mind, each one as God has given to him a measure of faith."

So, it is necessary to think something of ourselves but there are obviously limits, and a sound mind will set those limits.

There was a song decades ago by George Benson called "the Greatest Love of All" and it he said that "leaning to love yourself is the greatest love of all".....he was right but for the reason that Paul outlined above. It IS necessary to love yourself but not to the exclusion of others...as Paul said in Philippians 2:3-4...."Do nothing out of contentiousness or out of egotism, but with humility consider others superior to you, 4 as you look out not only for your own interests, but also for the interests of others."

We must have some self interest in order to have the will to be interested in anyone else...even God.


What were the two commandments that Jesus gave to his demanding disciples?
 

Deeje

Avid Bible Student
Premium Member
What were the two commandments that Jesus gave to his demanding disciples?

Demanding disciples?

"After the Pharisees heard that he had silenced the Sadducees, they came together in one group. 35 And one of them, versed in the Law, tested him by asking: 36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” 37 He said to him: “‘You must love Jehovah your God with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind.’ 38 This is the greatest and first commandment. 39 The second, like it, is this: ‘You must love your neighbor as yourself.40 On these two commandments the whole Law hangs, and the Prophets.”

This was a reply to someone testing him....not his disciples.
 
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