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Unconditional Love

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
In my view, there is such a thing as unconditional love*. However, so far as I know it is:

  • relatively rare (doesn't happen to everyone, and infrequently happens to anyone),
  • usually extremely brief (typically lasting only moments),
  • is as much (or even more so) a perspective or way of perceiving as it is an emotion,
  • cannot be forced to come about (there is no guaranteed path to it, or means of bringing it about),
  • is typically life-transforming.

It's nature makes it difficult to research scientifically, but I suspect it has a neurological basis, and that it is closely related in physiology to the mystical experience of oneness.

But what's your own take on unconditional love?



*Selfless love that is given freely, without demanding that the beloved comply with any requirements as a condition of being loved. Not to be confused with love that is merely self-sacrificing. That is, selfless love does not entail self-sacrifice. The "beloved" here can be a person, place, thing, or -- perhaps most often -- an entire perceptual field.

EDIT: I should have written here that the "beloved" -- or object of one's unconditional love -- is almost certain to be the contents of one's entire perceptual field. Thus it is most likely to include everything one is perceiving during the experience of unconditional love.
 

Tmac

Active Member
In my view, there is such a thing as unconditional love*. However, so far as I know it is:

  • relatively rare (doesn't happen to everyone, and infrequently happens to anyone),
  • usually extremely brief (typically lasting only moments),
  • is as much (or even more so) a perspective or way of perceiving as it is an emotion,
  • cannot be forced to come about (there is no guaranteed path to it, or means of bringing it about),
  • is typically life-transforming.

It's nature makes it difficult to research scientifically, but I suspect it has a neurological basis, and that it is closely related in physiology to the mystical experience of oneness.

But what's your own take on unconditional love?



*Selfless love that is given freely, without demanding that the beloved comply with any requirements as a condition of being loved. Not to be confused with love that is merely self-sacrificing. That is, selfless love does not entail self-sacrifice. The "beloved" here can be a person, place, thing, or -- perhaps most often -- an entire perceptual field.

We have gotten off on the wrong foot before so please know that is not my intention. I'm not versed on how to reply to sections of what you wrote but some of your thoughts were so true that I felt the vibrations.

I would like to talk about what you know so far? Your thoughts speaks of incidents, how is it that you can see it so clearly and not experience it at the same time?
 

savagewind

Veteran Member
Premium Member
The love of a parent for his child has a reason for it.

Is the kind of love asked about for this thread the kind of love that also has no reason for it? @Sunstone
 

Brickjectivity

Turned to Stone. Now I stretch daily.
Staff member
Premium Member
But what's your own take on unconditional love?
I think love pain is an example of the kind of love we feel for family or 'Loved ones'. It is pain and relief. When you are falling in love you get that adrenaline spike that permanently screws up your heart, all those chemicals coursing through you; and you are cooked. When you take care of a baby, that baby unknowingly works its magic on you, and you lose yourself. When it cries you hurt.

I think unconditional love would be like that but extended beyond normal physical capacity. You'd hurt for everyone. You could imagine loving everyone, and you could believe that you loved everyone. I suppose you could pull it off, but from a normal point of view you'd be insane. You'd be nonfunctional. Its possible that there is a drug that would make you love absolutely everyone unconditionally. I wonder if that will be discovered someday.
 

Tmac

Active Member
Did you know that as an eagle flies away from its mate that it increasingly feels pain?

I think that is an example of the kind of love we feel for family or 'Loved ones'. It is pain and relief. When you are falling in love you get that adrenaline spike that permanently screws up your heart, all those chemicals coursing through you; and you are cooked. When you take care of a baby, that baby unknowingly works its magic on you, and you lose yourself. When it cries you hurt.

I think unconditional love would be like that but extended beyond normal physical capacity. You'd hurt for everyone. You could imagine loving everyone, and you could believe that you loved everyone. I suppose you could pull it off, but from a normal point of view you'd be insane. You'd be nonfunctional. Its possible that there is a drug that would make you love absolutely everyone unconditionally. I wonder if that will be discovered someday.

I wonder how they measured that? The eagle thing?
 

savagewind

Veteran Member
Premium Member
If unconditional love is the kind of love that has no reason for it then I think it isn't something that is real.

Because even if I loved everything without expecting anything, there would be a reason; which reason is that it is righteous to do so, I think.
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
Unconditional love is scary, but relatively simple to achieve. One of the side effects of allowing yourself to love unconditionally is that you also find that you have come to love yourself unconditionally as well. At least, this has been my experience. The first step in loving unconditionally is deleting, or at least, deferring judgement of the person or object that you have come to love. This allows you to see the real person, and you can choose to love or not love the real person.
 

Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber
No disrespect to you personally, I question the purity of that love, selfish motives dance in the background.
When I came out to my mom, she has shown me nothing but parental love, and has been accepting and supportive of me, asking me why I didn't come out sooner, and she has done nothing but continue to shower me with love and support. Which she also does for my siblings, even though they both have and continue to screw up big time.
If you've read/watched Game of Thrones, there's no doubting my mom's unconditional and endless love for her children just as there is no doubting Cersei Lannister's unconditional and boundless love for her children.
 

SalixIncendium

अग्निविलोवनन्दः
Staff member
Premium Member
In my view, there is such a thing as unconditional love*. However, so far as I know it is:

  • relatively rare (doesn't happen to everyone, and infrequently happens to anyone),
  • usually extremely brief (typically lasting only moments),
  • is as much (or even more so) a perspective or way of perceiving as it is an emotion,
  • cannot be forced to come about (there is no guaranteed path to it, or means of bringing it about),
  • is typically life-transforming.

It's nature makes it difficult to research scientifically, but I suspect it has a neurological basis, and that it is closely related in physiology to the mystical experience of oneness.

But what's your own take on unconditional love?



*Selfless love that is given freely, without demanding that the beloved comply with any requirements as a condition of being loved. Not to be confused with love that is merely self-sacrificing. That is, selfless love does not entail self-sacrifice. The "beloved" here can be a person, place, thing, or -- perhaps most often -- an entire perceptual field.

Unconditional love, in my view, lies not in the body or in the mind, but universal consciousness. Humans have a predisposition to fight amongst themselves for trivial reasons, but this unconditional love, in the presence of an outside threat, can cause complete strangers to band together and protect one another.

An example that comes to mind. In the midst of all of the partisan in-fighting and chaos of the 2000 presidential election, the majority of people in the US, regardless of partisan lines or religion, banded together to protect one another as a result of the 9/11 attacks.

This unconditional love can be more prevalent in those that form a spiritual connection by way of such things as a parent/child relationship.
 
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It Aint Necessarily So

Veteran Member
Premium Member
In my view, there is such a thing as unconditional love*. However, so far as I know it is:

  • relatively rare (doesn't happen to everyone, and infrequently happens to anyone),
  • usually extremely brief (typically lasting only moments),
  • is as much (or even more so) a perspective or way of perceiving as it is an emotion,
  • cannot be forced to come about (there is no guaranteed path to it, or means of bringing it about),
  • is typically life-transforming.

It's nature makes it difficult to research scientifically, but I suspect it has a neurological basis, and that it is closely related in physiology to the mystical experience of oneness.

But what's your own take on unconditional love?

*Selfless love that is given freely, without demanding that the beloved comply with any requirements as a condition of being loved. Not to be confused with love that is merely self-sacrificing. That is, selfless love does not entail self-sacrifice. The "beloved" here can be a person, place, thing, or -- perhaps most often -- an entire perceptual field.

EDIT: I should have written here that the "beloved" -- or object of one's unconditional love -- is almost certain to be the contents of one's entire perceptual field. Thus it is most likely to include everything one is perceiving during the experience of unconditional love.

Unconditional love, as the phrase implies, only applies to situations in which there are no conditions imposed on the object of that love - no expectations. I can see having that relationship with a young child, but almost nobody else. One can disassociate from a hateful or disloyal adult child, spouse, adult relative, etc.. There is no duty to keep offering the benefits of one's love to others that don't meet minimal conditions.

Loving enemies is not a virtue any more than trusting them is. Enemies have to be satisfied with indifference and separation.
 

Tmac

Active Member
When I came out to my mom, she has shown me nothing but parental love, and has been accepting and supportive of me, asking me why I didn't come out sooner, and she has done nothing but continue to shower me with love and support. Which she also does for my siblings, even though they both have and continue to screw up big time.
If you've read/watched Game of Thrones, there's no doubting my mom's unconditional and endless love for her children just as there is no doubting Cersei Lannister's unconditional and boundless love for her children.

Do you think we can have a dialogue without you getting upset with me?

My father, who I didn't believe loved me at all,l showed me that love was more than just softness, that your love for someone transcends their behavior but even he has/had expectations and unconditional love doesn't, he taught me to have expectations for myself but try as he could, he couldn't hide that his expectations when he took part in my conception were never realized. Now life loves unconditionally, without question, expectation, disappointment, all the things that come with conditional love.
Have you ever wondered why you felt as though you had to keep this from her?

Cersei Lannister is an example of unconditional boundless love, please show me.
 
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lewisnotmiller

Grand Hat
Staff member
Premium Member
The not uncommon love of a parent for his or her child comes to mind.

I'm not convinced it's completely unconditional. I'm a parent with two girls, and would take a bullet for either without thinking twice. But I think they could destroy my love for them if they acted heinously enough. It would need to be extreme, and I can't know for sure, but that's my suspicion.
 
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