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"Jailbait"/Ephebophilia

biased

Active Member
What are your thoughts on jailbait/Ephebophilia? Morally repugnant? Natural?

I'm not going to lie, evolutionarily speaking it doesn't make sense to not desire say a 16 year old and I like to fap. All hail fathermore (reverse the opposite words to find a fantastic site, legal site of course).
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
Just about any 16 year old is pleasing to look at, even if only because youth has its own beauty, but when was the last time you really listened to a 16 year old -- to her dreams, anxieties, interests, and longings? Didn't listening to her quickly give you a sense you were pretty much past that, a sense of the gulf between you?
 

biased

Active Member
I don't really talk to 16 year olds but honestly if there were no legal repercussions...well I'll stop there.
 

StarryNightshade

Spiritually confused Jew
Premium Member
Isn't "jail bait" a euphemism for someone who is barley past the age of consent?

Well, if they are past the age of consent, then there is noting inherently wrong with it I guess. I wouldn't partake in it (I vastly prefer men who are older than me), but if both parties can legally consent, then have at it.
 

biased

Active Member
Isn't "jail bait" a euphemism for someone who is barley past the age of consent?

Well, if they are past the age of consent, then there is noting inherently wrong with it I guess. I wouldn't partake in it (I vastly prefer men who are older than me), but if both parties can legally consent, then have at it.

I'm using it in the sense of Ephebophilia. Technically the AoC is 18 here but it's 16 in most places in Europe so it's really a varied term. Just refers to young girls, teenage years.
 

LuisDantas

Aura of atheification
Premium Member
It is of course natural to feel desire for 16-years-olders.

Biologically speaking, we were basically bred so that we would like them. There is nothing wrong, and just barely something avoidable at all, in feeling such an attraction.

What is unhealthy and often dangerous is the lack of means to control and reign that attraction. As Sunstone said, a related matter is that it isn't all that healthy or natural to find the aesthetics and physical appeal decisive.

A healthy man can of course feel nostalgic or even have desire and feel fully aware of it. It can even be very pleasant, and that should not be seen as a problem.

The problem is in feeling a significant drive towards having a relationship and/or intimacy on those grounds alone. A true relationship should consider a lot more beyond the appeal of a young body. Maturity counts and has an appeal of its own.
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
Even if you found yourself in love with a 16 year old, I think it would still be unwise to sexually pursue her. Love -- especially genuine love -- can cross all lines and boundaries. Age, race, religion, or whatever. But love is far from being everything.

There are so many ways in which you are likely to be incompatible even if the two of you are in love with each other. She's very unlikely to fully understand how you think and feel about things, and very unlikely to fully appreciate you.

Also, while you're trying to be very discrete about your relationship, she'll be telling her very closest eight friends all about it. And then, when the cops arrest you for statutory rape, she'll be astonished that even one of her very closest eight friends could betray her.
 
A

angellous_evangellous

Guest
Just about any 16 year old is pleasing to look at, even if only because youth has its own beauty, but when was the last time you really listened to a 16 year old -- to her dreams, anxieties, interests, and longings? Didn't listening to her quickly give you a sense you were pretty much past that, a sense of the gulf between you?

I'm with you, Sunstone. I'm not even attracted to anyone under 25 (I'm 34). I spent the last eight years on a college campus with some of the most beautiful girls in the country, but once they open their mouths (to speak), the power of their perfect bodies completely evaporates.

Good thing I spent all of my time in the library. :D
 

desideraht

Hellspawn
Not interested.

I'm 23 and like My men nearly pushing 30.
Found a cute guy online... but as soon as I saw he was 18 I was like "mehhhhhhh too youmg." I'll still give him a chance, though. I just remember being 18 and d*** 18 year olds can be stupid. 16 year olds even stupider. Although as evidenced by My ex, even 27 year olds can be complete douchetards.

I like to be the "younger" one. I look about 17.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
Not for me. Even the look is just too young, like a blank slate. If it comes to searching for a partner, I prefer somebody with life experience, wisdom, and what compassion looks like.

I also like laugh lines. People may boo-hoo creases and wrinkles, but laughlines show me they spend a good amount of time in a state of joy. Young adults and older teens don't have the look nor the mind - even those "old souls" when they exhibit uncommon common sense for their age - to be attractive to me.

I've gone out with a few friends of mine to the local bar & grill, and a couple of 21-year-olds will approach me most times seeing a younger-looking "cougar" type, and try to flirt with me. I wind up giving them pointers and encourage them to keep trying. It has very little imapct on me outside of being flattered, and I don't want to be rude, so I wind up mentoring them in some way. :p

I have a son who is 16 years old. His friends have been over to our house on numerous occasions. They're still like babies to me. Just no way I can find them attractive for potential mates or for fantasy material.
 

desideraht

Hellspawn
Not for me. Even the look is just too young, like a blank slate. If it comes to searching for a partner, I prefer somebody with life experience, wisdom, and what compassion looks like.

I also like laugh lines. People may boo-hoo creases and wrinkles, but laughlines show me they spend a good amount of time in a state of joy. Young adults and older teens don't have the look nor the mind - even those "old souls" when they exhibit uncommon common sense for their age - to be attractive to me.

I've gone out with a few friends of mine to the local bar & grill, and a couple of 21-year-olds will approach me most times seeing a younger-looking "cougar" type, and try to flirt with me. I wind up giving them pointers and encourage them to keep trying. It has very little imapct on me outside of being flattered, and I don't want to be rude, so I wind up mentoring them in some way. :p

I have a son who is 16 years old. His friends have been over to our house on numerous occasions. They're still like babies to me. Just no way I can find them attractive for potential mates or for fantasy material.
It is My ever struggle that people like you underestimate Me for My looks. My ex always leaned towards believing I was immature—simply because I "look" it—and time and time again admitted to Me that I was far more mature than he "expected". It is those expectations that are so often my plight. People who could be compatible with Me turn Me down without giving it a chance because I "appear" to be immature or unwise. The truth is contrary. I will never claim to be a Master, nor a guru, but I simply am not as immature/unwise as people perceive Me to be. I am greatly underestimated, which, in most instances is a great advantage to Me, but in dating, it is very disadvantageous and frustrating.

If someone were to "mentor" Me I would hastily turn the other cheek. It is so utterly humiliating to have someone assume I don't know what I am doing or what I want simply because of My age or how I look. I am a very empowered human being, and a beast of one to boot. I know what I want which is a rare thing these days, especially with youth. People not only assume I am younger than I really am, but when the meet Me and learn my age they still assume that because I look young I must be mentally younger. Such a presumption tells Me this person is not very open-minded nor are they wise, for the Wise knows that looks may and often do deceive. I for one exercise incredible deception. He who-ever shall be My Mate will be Blessed with the body and sexual voraciousness of a so-called "youth" yet with the mind of a ripened human being. Again, I will not claim to be "better" than My peers, but I will state that I am not immature for My age, and that My looks do not somehow lessen my knowledge, Wisdom, or maturity in any way.

The right man will know this, and see My physical youth as a Blessing, and lust for it. We shall partake in hedonistic indulgence, for acts of Joy and Pleasure are Life's rituals.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
It is My ever struggle that people like you underestimate Me for My looks. My ex always leaned towards believing I was immature—simply because I "look" it—and time and time again admitted to Me that I was far more mature than he "expected". It is those expectations that are so often my plight. People who could be compatible with Me turn Me down without giving it a chance because I "appear" to be immature or unwise. The truth is contrary. I will never claim to be a Master, nor a guru, but I simply am not as immature/unwise as people perceive Me to be. I am greatly underestimated, which, in most instances is a great advantage to Me, but in dating, it is very disadvantageous and frustrating.

Don't take it personally. I'm under 5 feet tall. Not everybody is attracted to somebody my size either.

If someone were to "mentor" Me I would hastily turn the other cheek. It is so utterly humiliating to have someone assume I don't know what I am doing or what I want simply because of My age or how I look. I am a very empowered human being, and a beast of one to boot. I know what I want which is a rare thing these days, especially with youth. People not only assume I am younger than I really am, but when the meet Me and learn my age they still assume that because I look young I must be mentally younger. Such a presumption tells Me this person is not very open-minded nor are they wise, for the Wise knows that looks may and often do deceive. I for one exercise incredible deception. He who-ever shall be My Mate will be Blessed with the body and sexual voraciousness of a so-called "youth" yet with the mind of a ripened human being. Again, I will not claim to be "better" than My peers, but I will state that I am not immature for My age, and that My looks do not somehow lessen my knowledge, Wisdom, or maturity in any way.

Well, if somebody who is younger is stumbling with his or her attempts to try to pick me up, I want to help. I think it's rude to brush them off completely, and it's dishonest of me to lead them on. Your mileage my vary, though.

The right man will know this, and see My physical youth as a Blessing, and lust for it. We shall partake in hedonistic indulgence, for acts of Joy and Pleasure are Life's rituals.

Then go for it and have fun. I prefer older men and women, just like you prefer older men. So I don't see the problem. :shrug:
 

desideraht

Hellspawn
Then go for it and have fun. I prefer older men and women, just like you prefer older men. So I don't see the problem. :shrug:
There is having a preference and then there's ascribing a stereotype to that which you do not prefer, and that is where the problem lies.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
There is having a preference and then there's ascribing a stereotype to that which you do not prefer, and that is where the problem lies.

Stereotype? Like what? That younger people are less mature than older people? ;)

I must have hit a nerve with you. I can't be attracted to 16-year-olds. I'm 40. I don't see a problem with my way of thinking. Perhaps you can point out the stereotype where you think I ought to be open to being attracted to boys and girls who are the same age as my kids?
 

desideraht

Hellspawn
Stereotype? Like what? That younger people are less mature than older people? ;)
Yes. And that people who look young are immature.

I must have hit a nerve with you.
Thank you for stating the obvious. Now may we address the problem? This is not about your attraction. You are entirely entitled to it. But you just told me that 21-year-olds obviously don't know what they are doing. Do you not see the discrepancy, or do I need to illustrate it for you? I respect your level of intelligence and don't feel like I should have to.
 

lewisnotmiller

Grand Hat
Staff member
Premium Member
Not my thing. I'll admit, there are some pretty girls around, and I notice them, but if I'm thinking about any of my fantasies, etc, they invariably don't involve girls that much younger than me.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
Yes. And that people who look young are immature.

Then that makes me immature too. I look very young for my age. :angel2:

I find it odd that I said I'd mentor young fellas who are stumbling and bumbling with their attempts at picking me up, and you took issue with that and how I can't be attracted to teenaged-looking people...yet you said this in your response:

I just remember being 18 and d*** 18 year olds can be stupid. 16 year olds even stupider. Although as evidenced by My ex, even 27 year olds can be complete douchetards.

And you think I'm harsh?

Thank you for stating the obvious. Now may we address the problem? This is not about your attraction. You are entirely entitled to it. But you just told me that 21-year-olds obviously don't know what they are doing. Do you not see the discrepancy, or do I need to illustrate it for you? I respect your level of intelligence and don't feel like I should have to.

Compared to most 40 and 50 year olds, they don't. It's not an insult. I was 21 once. I knew a lot, but not nearly as much as I know now. Aging offers the opportunity to learn from triumphs and setbacks.

I'm not naive enough to think that at my age I have the wisdom of a 60-year-old. Especially when it comes to matters of facing my own mortality, chronic illnesses and joint pains, and being a grandparent. I just don't have the same life experience they do. And being so young doesn't offer as much experience and wisdom in sexuality and dating as someone who has had years and years and years of experience under his or her belt.

In time, with experience, one begins to see the games people play, insecurities and how they're masked, and potential problems in people who you wish to approach and/or in people who are approaching you. At the age of the older teen and young adult, those patterns are much more difficult to pick up, and they're more difficult to work with simply because one typically doesn't have the practice to deal with people who aren't aware of their daddy or mommy issues, who haven't gotten over an ex-partner, who don't yet know what they want to do in their lives, who are insecure in their ability to connect with people, and who have dreams and goals (as Sunstone mentioned) that includes growing up and getting married and having a family.

I've been there and done that, and now I'm moving on to goals like what kind of memories to I want to leave behind, how to establish a nest egg, enjoying time with my aging parents who I know will not be here forever, etc. The goals and dreams are very different in flavor, and how does an 18 year old empathize with a person who is dealing with issues pertaining to having adult children with their own kids? How does a 16 year old connect with somebody wondering how to help their kids with college?

So, you prefer older men. So do I. I like laugh lines and wrinkles and creases and conversations about what they've experienced in their lives and what they've accomplished. I just can't be attracted to somebody so young that they're just starting out in life. When I'm with an older teen or young adult, I prefer to be a source of support and mentorship, and feel I give more value in that capacity with such a large age difference.

Look, I think Sophia Loren is one hot mama. But if she ever said she can't be attracted to anybody younger than 70, it's not a personal attack or a stereotype. So I'm out of her dating pool. I can move on.
 
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