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Hilarious Christians!

*Anne*

Bliss Ninny
Does anyone else think this sentence makes it all sound like more fun?

"The purity of our souls is just too important to gamble away by hard and lustful anal fornication."

*clamps hand over mouth to stifle a giggle*
 

Kilgore Trout

Misanthropic Humanist
Does anyone else think this sentence makes it all sound like more fun?

"The purity of our souls is just too important to gamble away by hard and lustful anal fornication."

*clamps hand over mouth to stifle a giggle*

Well, there's their problem. Anal fornication shouldn't be hard. No wonder they're not enjoying it.
 

*Anne*

Bliss Ninny
Don't be scared ~ Google it. :) There's a version for the ladies too.

(My brother works for the company.)

*Edit: Warning ~ The official site is a bit...graphic...with details. Our family makes jokes about Gun Oil all the time (we all want to work at the main headquarters/warehouse...:D...just to aggravate my brother ), but even I flinch at some of the stuff written on there.
 
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Quagmire

Imaginary talking monkey
Staff member
Premium Member
From Christwire: "Sodomy can trace its origins to the homosexual world. Gays have always been keenly fascinated in violating themselves in perverse, anti-Christian ways. Whether it’s destroying marriage or turning good-natured boys into transvestites, they have no self-control when it comes to depravity."

So when these people think of the gay community, they see this:

LOTR%20Orc%20Army.JPG


Army of Godless Gays getting ready to storm the bastions of American decency.
 
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FlyingTeaPot

Irrational Rationalist. Educated Fool.
From Christwire: One trick passed on to me is that you can press your nose to a young man’s mattress, inhale deeply and (irregardless of the smell) announce, “That smells like semen.” If the boy’s face turns red and he runs from the room, the evidence is clear.

Oh, those dirty, dirty christians! :D
 

*Anne*

Bliss Ninny
"Do Some People Have an Instinct For Spotting Masturbators?"

Okay. I've studied the signs and the photos. Let's see if I can spot any at the park district tonight!
 

T-Dawg

Self-appointed Lunatic
The article on masturbation sort of makes me wonder if I'm healthy - there's no way anyone could look at or sniff my sheets for semen. I don't ejaculate anywhere near enough semen or with anywhere near enough force to get on the sheets. I have two towels for masturbating, one for my desk, and one for my bed, and those two towels are the only thing my semen ever touches. Why anyone would let their semen get on the sheets is beyond me.

I do like some of the comments, though. The highest-rated ones tend to be the most sensible, despite the site being organized by the insane. Anyone can rate up comments, though, so it's likely that non-members of the site might have influenced it a bit :D.
 
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