UU joke of the day/week (tradition, pray, catholic, God)

[Davidium]

In an effort to keep up with the fast paced life in a major city, a Unitarian Universalist minister called his lay-leaders together and challenged them to think of ways to implement "spreading the Good Word" of Unitarian Universalism in their community.

He divided them into three groups, and told them to think of how they could use modern culture to bring people into the church. He then dropped his bombshell, and stated that he was going on a two week vacation, and when he came back he wanted to see their ideas implemented. The lay-leaders had been lazy, in his opinion, and he was trying to get them active.

After enjoying his vacation, the minister began his morning drive back to the church. He noticed that, while he had been away, there was an upsurge of graffiti... and that one of the local groups of graffiti artists was now using a symbol that looked suspiciously like the UU "chalice".......

He then noticed a billboard advertising what seemed to be a new reality television show on a local network, which would take the pastors of different churches, stick them on an island, and leave them there till they all learned to get along... and his name was listed in the credits!

Perplexed and bewlidered, he nearly wrecked his car as he pulled into the church parking lot, and was funnled into a new lane that had been created. The new concrete curb forced him to drive around the back of the church, and brought him up to one of the church's windows, where a sign said "stop here".

As he stopped his car, the window opened, and one of his lay-leaders leaned out and said "Welcome to Unitarian King... can I take your order?"

The moral of this story is... If you dont give your UU lay-leaders specific guidence in what you are looking for, you get what you deserve. If they didnt think outside the box, they wouldnt be UU's.

YoUUrs in Faith,

David Pyle
Galveston Island, TX
www.uugalveston.org

[michel]

Originally Posted by Davidium

In an effort to keep up with the fast paced life in a major city, a Unitarian Universalist minister called his lay-leaders together and challenged them to think of ways to implement "spreading the Good Word" of Unitarian Universalism in their community.

He divided them into three groups, and told them to think of how they could use modern culture to bring people into the church. He then dropped his bombshell, and stated that he was going on a two week vacation, and when he came back he wanted to see their ideas implemented. The lay-leaders had been lazy, in his opinion, and he was trying to get them active.

After enjoying his vacation, the minister began his morning drive back to the church. He noticed that, while he had been away, there was an upsurge of graffiti... and that one of the local groups of graffiti artists was now using a symbol that looked suspiciously like the UU "chalice".......

He then noticed a billboard advertising what seemed to be a new reality television show on a local network, which would take the pastors of different churches, stick them on an island, and leave them there till they all learned to get along... and his name was listed in the credits!

Perplexed and bewlidered, he nearly wrecked his car as he pulled into the church parking lot, and was funnled into a new lane that had been created. The new concrete curb forced him to drive around the back of the church, and brought him up to one of the church's windows, where a sign said "stop here".

As he stopped his car, the window opened, and one of his lay-leaders leaned out and said "Welcome to Unitarian King... can I take your order?"

The moral of this story is... If you dont give your UU lay-leaders specific guidence in what you are looking for, you get what you deserve. If they didnt think outside the box, they wouldnt be UU's.

YoUUrs in Faith,

David Pyle
Galveston Island, TX
www.uugalveston.org

I like that; I hope this one hasn't been posted before...
The clergy in other denominations have a hard time figuring us out.

One time at an ecumenical service the Episcopal rector said, "Let us pray. And for you Unitarians, do whatever it is you do."

[Green Gaia]

I was looking for the lightbulb jokes and had to resurrect this thread, it's just too funny.

[Green Gaia]

After the secular humanists came along, we said that UUs believe in One God - at Most.

Now, what with the 6th Source and the pagans, we say that UUs believe in One God - More or Less.

[Green Gaia]

Did you hear about the UU version of Baseball?

Instead of three strikes and you're out, it's three strikes and you're special.

[lilithu]

I managed to find some more UU jokes!

A UU meeting must seem strange to outsiders.
A person will speak and says nothing. Nobody listens, and then everybody disagrees.


btw, you can view all the uu jokes I've collected here but you can only see them one at a time.

[lilithu]

A little UU girl was sitting on the curb in front of her house with a sad look on her face. An older lady happened upon her and asked her why she looked so sad. The girl replied, "My kitty cat died."

The older woman, trying to be helpful, said to the little girl, "I know you're sad, but right now your kitty cat is with Jesus."

The girl crinkled her nose for a second and replied, "What would Jesus want with a dead cat?"

[lilithu]

from the tv show MASH:

"The General answers his own phone. Must be a Unitarian."
- Col. Sherman Potter, M.A.S.H 4077

[lilithu]

Now I'll tell you a real story that happened in our Sunday school. The Kindergarten class was discussing "prayer", and the children seemed aware that the way you end a prayer was with "amen."

"Does anyone know what 'amen' means?," the teacher asked. There was a long silence. Then one little boy piped up, and with appropriate, computer-age gestures, said, "Well, I think it means, like, 'send.'"

(from the First Unitarian Church of Albuquerque, New Mexico)