I really wish I believed (reincarnation, God)

[Storm Moon]

So you're saying that we shouldn't have emotions at all? I don't see the sense in that.

[Katzpur]

Originally Posted by Beachcomber

Thanks for your reply. I'm curious....do you pray, and if you do, do you feel that you commune with God?

Actually, I do. I pray intently and often. It's very difficult for me to explain, but it's almost as if I was born believing that there was a God, a Higher Power who knows me personally. Was I taught this as a child? Yes I was, and it's obviously part of why I believe it. My sister, on the other hand, was taught exactly the same things as I was taught, is agnostic. I see us both as intelligent, rational human beings.

I have often wondered if maybe God's "all in my head," and have even tried to convince myself that that could be the case. Something deep inside me, though, won't let me believe it. I just "know" -- as much as it is possible for anyone to know -- that I have a Father in Heaven and that He knows me, cares about me, and answers my prayers.

Am I just completely out in left field? Is He there and I don't hear him?

You're not out in left field at all. I don't see theists and atheists (or agnostics) as being all that different fundamentally. I don't believe that intelligence or moral decency have anything to do with whether a person believes in God or not. Some people simply have faith in something they cannot see or prove; others don't. For me, it's as simple as that.

[jonny]

Originally Posted by Lintu

I don't think I believe in God anymore, but I really wish I could. I particularly wish I could believe in an afterlife. I find death extremely scary now that I don't

The first step to believing is desire. It sounds like you got that. Now, you need to ask yourself what is keeping you from turning that desire into action.

[MysticSang'ha]

Originally Posted by Beachcomber

When I say I'm "saved", I mean that in the past, I have gone through the "ritual" of asking Jesus Christ to come into my life and forgive my sins. I have prayed that prayer in earnest. People call that being "saved". But I don't feel saved. I don't feel connected. I feel lost. And I have tried very hard to connect with God, and I don't feel a connection. that's why I'm here on this site at this hour. It is very disturbing to me that I feel so disconnected.

Been there.



That's a very scary position, when you've gone through all the necessary rituals that you've been told you must perform and *POOF*, all worries, pain, and fear are promised to be wiped away by the blood of Christ. For me, that's where the real fear and misery began. I consulted with pastors, peer counselors, and anyone who I could get my hands on who were Christian, but none could give a perspective that brought peace of mind.


I prayed and prayed, cried, tore some of my hair out terrified of dying in my sleep, and prayed some more to Jesus and to God the Father. Nothing was there except more fear and more desperation, so I understand what you're going through. I felt like a fraud every time I stepped in to church and professing anything akin to the Nicene Creed.



Not that I expect you to give up all rational thought and come to the "dark side" called Tibetan Buddhism like I wound up doing. For me, studying the Dharma brought a peace of mind that nothing else ever did.............to me it speaks the ultimate truth, but I can't prescribe that to everyone since I don't believe the truth reveals itself the same way to everyone.



If it makes you feel any better, a LOT of people here and elsewhere have walked in your shoes, and they have every opportunity to still wind up being decent human beings. Some have found their way back to Christ with a much deeper understanding and a good dose of wisdom and perspective. Some have found other practices or have found a "home" that defines reality and ethics in a language they understand completely.



Good luck!



Peace,
Mystic

[rasor]

Originally Posted by Lintu

Oh definitely--once you're actually dead, if it really is just the end, you don't know. But the thought of consciousness being gone forever scares the bejeesus out of me.

Did it scare you all the milleniure before you were born? Of course not.Just thank your lucky stars you were one of your mothers eggs which won the jackpot.think of all those possible people who missed out on the chance of 3 score years and ten

[Beachcomber]

Thanks for answering me Mystic,
You say that you are from the "dark side" and I think your title says Tibetan buddist. I will have to look that up to see what it means. I know of the Dali Lama and he seems to be in peace himself and is in high demand to spread his "peace". But other than that I don't know much about him or Buddism....I will have to study.
Why do you say your belief is "dark"? I'm so glad I found this website so I can ask my questions without anyone getting freaked out that I might be questioning things. I am surrounded by good old-fashioned fundamentalist Christians, and I'm also a schoolteacher, and so I don't dare allow anyone to think that I'm anything other than, for fear they might get alarmed about just who is teaching their children. Not that we speak of religion in the classroom, but this is a small town.....you probably know how it goes.

[rasor]

Originally Posted by Beachcomber

Thanks for answering me Mystic,
I am surrounded by good old-fashioned fundamentalist Christians, and I'm also a schoolteacher, and so I don't dare allow anyone to think that I'm anything other than, for fear they might get alarmed about just who is teaching their children. Not that we speak of religion in the classroom, but this is a small town.....you probably know how it goes.

Ahh, the power of Religion.I feel sorry for you having to live with people like that.

[PureX]

Originally Posted by jonny

The first step to believing is desire. It sounds like you got that. Now, you need to ask yourself what is keeping you from turning that desire into action.

Jonny is right. Faith is hope put into action. You don't need to "believe" in God, necessarily. You just need to hope, and then live by that hope. If you do that, you will find it yeilds positive results even without a set "belief". It's the practice of faith that saves us, heals us, and changes us, not our "beliefs".

[lombas]

I wanted to believe during all 12 years at Jesuit college.

Then, three years in university, one day, I believed. One day, one event.

[lombas]

Originally Posted by PureX

It's the practice of faith that saves us, heals us, and changes us, not our "beliefs".

That sounds a bit strange. So if you don't ask too much questions but do things by the book, you can be at ease? Or what do you mean saying that?