Sometimes I Hate Being a Woman (experience, vain, God, heaven)

[lunamoth]

OK, this is something of a rant... but...

Sometimes I really hate being a woman, and one of those times is when I have to find someone new to cut my hair. This is often a very stressful experience for me and I know this seems overblown and I don't think I'm overly vain but I would like to look stylish and not like a FREAK when I walk out of salon.

I like to have my hair cut short, but it needs to be a precision cut because my hair is very fine. I can usually tell while the person is cutting whether they have any idea of what they are doing...and if they start asking me lots of questions about lines and length then I know we are in trouble because...I have no idea of how to cut hair! What did they go to school for if they need to ask me????

And I'm not going for budget cuts either. I go to what I think are fairly expensive places, I'm paying $45 plus tip for these haircuts! But I am about ready to go to a Supercuts or a barber for goodness sakes and pay $20 because spending this money is doing me no good.

Yesterday I went to a new place. I could tell we were in trouble right away. But this is the worst cut I've had in a long time, the stylist cut one side of my bangs way too short so there a huge gap in front, and then cut the top too short so it sticks up!!@! The rest of it feels uneven as well...and the back is cut square and very unflattering when I specifically said I'd like it be have a little fringe to it. Help!



The other time I hate being a woman is when shopping for clothes. I go past the men's department and see all the pants and shirts and ties neatly laid out and easy to find, colors and styles all are similar and coordinated...then I get to the women's department and I feel like I've entered the maze of the Minatour. It's not like I have a hard to find size or anything, but even in the best department stores (OK, except maybe Nordstrom's which I don't dare enter) the women's clothes are all over the place with styles and colors. If all I want is a nice pair of black pants and a blouse, I have to go through almost all of the racks to find these simple items. And I think most of the 'styles' are really hideous and I wonder who in the world they are made for. I absolutely hate shopping for clothes...I quickly flee to the jeans and t-shirts section after finally fiding the same classic black pants and white sweater combination. Heaven forbid I ever had a job I actually had to dress for...jeans were great in the lab.

And, last but not least, I hate women's shoes. I know, I know, the horror! The blasphemy! Djamilia and Zombieharlot and swooning as I type. But seriously, the styles are ugly/freakish and I really wonder if the fashion industry is playing some kind of elaborate and expensive joke on us. They are ridiculously expensive and if you do pick a new style it will be out of fashion next year. I do not have need for dress shoes very often, but of course I do need them once in a while for the rare time we go out to dinner or a party, so I have to have these dumb shoes. I actually bought a pair of those silly pointy black dress shoes from Nordstrom's last year, under the guidance of my sister-in-law-the-banker, and I have worn them twice and they are already out of style. And I hate them and they hurt my feet.

There, now I feel better.

End rant.

[Paladin]

There, there now, have some cookies and some earl grey and it will all be a little better
Susan often complains of these things too, luckily we tend to shop more at LLBean, and local outfitters more. Since she has to be a little more businesslike at work (She heads the counseling dept at Horace Mann middle school here in C Springs) at least after work its jeans, boots and fleece! God I love Colorado!

Peace
Mark

[Guitar's Cry]

Actually, I'm going through the same thing with my hair. I recently moved and I need to get a haircut from someone other than the lady who has cut my hair since I was a kid. I'm actually stressing over it!

(P.S. I'm also a guy)

[lunamoth]

Originally Posted by Paladin

There, there now, have some cookies and some earl grey and it will all be a little better
Susan often complains of these things too, luckily we tend to shop more at LLBean, and local outfitters more. Since she has to be a little more businesslike at work (She heads the counseling dept at Horace Mann middle school here in C Springs) at least after work its jeans, boots and fleece! God I love Colorado!

Peace
Mark

Thank you Mark. Yes, thank God I live in Colorado and not San Francisco or NYC.

What I don't understand is that many women I know complain about these things. It makes me want to open a combination women's clothing/hairstyle/coffee and book store for the millions of us who want classy simple things without turning shopping into a full-time occupation.

[Gentoo]

I also hate shopping for clothes. But for me, it's too much selection and I honestly have no idea what I'm doing. I grew up clothes shopping out of catelogs, so going to a store now is overwhelming, especially when the arrangment of the clothing looks like a bomb went off.

And shoes. I don't understand the fascination with shoes. They go on your feet, there's no need to look at someone's feet when you're talking to them. There are some styles where I question the sanity of the designer: "What the heck are they thinking? Who in their right mind is going to wear something like that?"

I never really thought a pair of shoes could be ugly until I was a bridesmaid for one of my friends. White slightly heeled flip-flops (which are an absolute no-no for me anyway) with sparkles on the bands. First time I had truly wanted my money back. Luckily I don't have to wear them ever again.

[lunamoth]

Originally Posted by Guitar's Cry

Actually, I'm going through the same thing with my hair. I recently moved and I need to get a haircut from someone other than the lady who has cut my hair since I was a kid. I'm actually stressing over it!

(P.S. I'm also a guy)

He he, actually I do cut my husband's hair and I will be happy to cut yours if you don't mind coming to Colorado and don't mind having a hair cut that looks just like my husband's.

But seriously, I know guys can also have a hard time finding someone to cut their hair. My hub just does not have all that much to worry about anymore.

[robtex]

Luna, the crazist part about your OP is that men don't care about how a woman's shoes or hair or dress look. Women dress-up essentially for other women. Women make interpretations and preceptions based on appareal much more quickly and often than men. To me and most other guys you would be the same woman if you wore tennis shoes and some jeans or if you an expensive skirt and shoes that hurt your feet.

[Paladin]

Luna,

Let me know when you open shop, Susan and I will make the drive up to shop there!
Your hubby and I have the same haircut probably. I just tell the girl to use the #5 clippers and take it off; makes things simple though my Suzie calls me "Monk Boy"

[lunamoth]

Originally Posted by Gentoo

I also hate shopping for clothes. But for me, it's too much selection and I honestly have no idea what I'm doing. I grew up clothes shopping out of catelogs, so going to a store now is overwhelming, especially when the arrangment of the clothing looks like a bomb went off.

And shoes. I don't understand the fascination with shoes. They go on your feet, there's no need to look at someone's feet when you're talking to them. There are some styles where I question the sanity of the designer: "What the heck are they thinking? Who in their right mind is going to wear something like that?"

I never really thought a pair of shoes could be ugly until I was a bridesmaid for one of my friends. White slightly heeled flip-flops (which are an absolute no-no for me anyway) with sparkles on the bands. First time I had truly wanted my money back. Luckily I don't have to wear them ever again.

Isn't it terrible Gentoo! I know it's a conspiracy on the part of department stores to make us have to look through every single article of clothing they have to find the one or two items worth buying. And I don't see women wearing these things you see on the racks. Ugh! The shoes overwhelm me. Yes, I do think a lot of them are really ugly, but the harder part is that there are very few styles that can serve multiple kinds of outfits and occasions. You know, men have dress shoes that are great for work or for going out in the evening, same for clothes. For women's shoes you get one pair for one outfit for one specific occasion that comes up maybe once a year, and then the whole outfit is out of style. Men's styles may change a little, but there is always a core traditional look that goes on for years. Maybe I'm cheap but I hate spending hundreds of dollars for one ensemble that I'll wear just once or twice. I usually can't pull the trigger and then I have nothing to wear...

[Djamila]

Originally Posted by lunamoth

Sometimes I really hate being a woman, and one of those times is when I have to find someone new to cut my hair. This is often a very stressful experience for me and I know this seems overblown and I don't think I'm overly vain but I would like to look stylish and not like a FREAK when I walk out of salon.

I agree. I have several friends and one professional business I trust to cut my hair. My hair has no real elaborate shape or style, but I'm very picky about how it's done and it falls against my neck and shoulders.

Originally Posted by lunamoth

The other time I hate being a woman is when shopping for clothes. I go past the men's department and see all the pants and shirts and ties neatly laid out and easy to find, colors and styles all are similar and coordinated...then I get to the women's department and I feel like I've entered the maze of the Minatour. It's not like I have a hard to find size or anything, but even in the best department stores (OK, except maybe Nordstrom's which I don't dare enter) the women's clothes are all over the place with styles and colors. If all I want is a nice pair of black pants and a blouse, I have to go through almost all of the racks to find these simple items. And I think most of the 'styles' are really hideous and I wonder who in the world they are made for. I absolutely hate shopping for clothes...I quickly flee to the jeans and t-shirts section after finally fiding the same classic black pants and white sweater combination. Heaven forbid I ever had a job I actually had to dress for...jeans were great in the lab.

I think this is a phenomenon of large cities and suburban North America, where stores are enormous. In Sarajevo, for example, the average clothing store has about half a dozen racks for shirts and skirts, and pants and other items in shelves against the wall. They're not huge and they're generally all very similar. You couldn't find two things in a City Fashion boutique, for example, that didn't match well.

So shopping is still frustrating, you have to go from store to store to put together simple outfits (more than two items), but once you're in the store it's not as hard. You should try visiting small, private-owned boutiques in the downtown district of your hometown.

Originally Posted by lunamoth

And, last but not least, I hate women's shoes. I know, I know, the horror! The blasphemy! Djamilia and Zombieharlot and swooning as I type. But seriously, the styles are ugly/freakish and I really wonder if the fashion industry is playing some kind of elaborate and expensive joke on us. They are ridiculously expensive and if you do pick a new style it will be out of fashion next year. I do not have need for dress shoes very often, but of course I do need them once in a while for the rare time we go out to dinner or a party, so I have to have these dumb shoes. I actually bought a pair of those silly pointy black dress shoes from Nordstrom's last year, under the guidance of my sister-in-law-the-banker, and I have worn them twice and they are already out of style. And I hate them and they hurt my feet.

The pain just means you've not yet molded your feet into the shape they need to be - hahaha.

I like shoe shopping, it's probably the most enjoyable form of shopping for me. Shoes generally fit. It's all about style, but the fit is almost always good. That gives you a lot of freedom without as much frustration - and makes it fun.