Befriending Enemies (beliefs, experience, religion, Roman)

[Lightkeeper]

Mohandas K. Ghandi:
It is easy enough to be friendly to one's friends. But to befriend the one who regards himself as your enemy is the quintessence of true religion. The other is mere business.

Whether you are religious or not, whether or to befriend enemies is something we all face. What do you think of this quote? Do you have experiences where you have befriended an enemy? What was the outcome? Why would it be important to befriend enemies?

[Lintu]

I don't see any reason to befriend an enemy if you don't particularly want to. What I do believe is important, regardless of how much you like a person, is mutual respect. There are some people I will never be friends with, but we can coexist peacefully with respect.

[Melody]

Originally Posted by Lightkeeper

Whether you are religious or not, whether or to befriend enemies is something we all face. What do you think of this quote? Do you have experiences where you have befriended an enemy? What was the outcome? Why would it be important to befriend enemies?

Yes, I have tried to make peace with an enemy but to date have not had much success. I stick out the olive branch and they cut it off....at my elbow. Not once...but twice. I'm sorry they consider themself my enemy, but I have no control over their perceptions and no more arms to give.

[Doc]

People like Ghandi and Martin Luther King seemed to have suceeded with such things. I try as best I can. But I have never really had an enemy. I have yet to walk the walk for this.

[Jaiket]

Like Lintu said, peaceful coexistance with those we differ from is important.

I believe myself to have no personal enemies, only political ones, and I can restrain myself from physical confrontations without any problem, but I will attack in other ways the things I do not believe worthy of existence (like hatred).

Understanding (or attempting to understand) beliefs I oppose usually helps me sustain and orderly dialougue with proponents of such beliefs where arguments would be unhelpful (like in the work place, or college class).

[TeMpUs3R]

The thing is, why have enemies in the first place?

[Scuba Pete]

I try to live by:

Romans 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. 20 On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

That doesn't mean I have to agree with someone just to keep the peace. But I have withdrawn statements about what I do believe in to smooth things over on here. Not everyone wants to hear what I have to say, and I am OK with that!

[michel]

Originally Posted by Melody

Yes, I have tried to make peace with an enemy but to date have not had much success. I stick out the olive branch and they cut it off....at my elbow. Not once...but twice. I'm sorry they consider themself my enemy, but I have no control over their perceptions and no more arms to give.

Yes, I have found that too; you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink. I like TeMpUS3R' "Why have enemies in the first place"-fruballs to you. I have one friend whom I have known for going on 30 years; he became 'distant' and I could sense his total disinterest when I used to 'phone him - each time I did, I tried to 'draw him out', as I sensed that there was something badly wrong, but he would not respond.
The last time I tried to speak to him, he was on holiday, and his wife (A wonderful, hard working woman who has had to deal with various health problems) answered the call. I was hardly surprised, but still disappointed to find that he has become totally introvert, has ceased any attempt of socialising with friends; he has also been given up as a lost cause by his own brother. No matter how much I would like to help, I know I cannot.
One 'amusing'? story comes to mind, though. My mother and her sister stopped talking to each other (through a mixture of misunderstandings, slights over money, politics) for over ten years.
One Sunday, after lunch, I (about 24 years old) started chatting about my aunt, and my mother was agreeing that the whole matter was such a shame.
Without saying a word, I went out of the room, telephoned my Aunt's number, spoke to my cousin, and litterally said "Look, this is so absurd-just get your mum to the 'phone and I'll get mine". They both chattered away, delighted to be able to resume their former sisterly feelings for each other. They remained good friends for each other (To the extent of going on holiday togeather) until my aunt died of cancer; my uncle used to come and see us regularly until his death. They were a wonderful couple.
I don't think I have any enemies; one of the most exciting things I find is to engage in conversation with anyone-I love very young children (but you have to be careful with them), elderly people; I make no judgement on appearance. Every one has something good to say and share.