A Common Facet Of Two Women (For Rebecca H. and For One Other) (mystic, soul)

[Sunstone]

Originally Posted by AlanGurvey

Does everything you make have an innuendo? Or symbolism involving women? :P

Anyways i thought the poem was gud!

Thank you, Alan! I actually hadn't intended there to be any innuendo in this one. It just came out that way. I was surprised when I re read it.

Of course, both women being spoken of as one woman in the poem have extraordinary sexualities, so maybe my subconcious wanted to put some innuendo in it...and did.

[evearael]

I really enjoyed this poem! I love the juxtaposition of the bears and elk which invokes fierceness and grace in their primal beauty. The words drip with devotion and adoration, and the reference to "kept lawns" only magnify the feeling of reverence for untamed souls of these two women. I also completely missed the slang that Standing_Alone mentioned. I would personally consider changing the word "huge" but other than that it is perfect. I feel that stream and ocean are both effective, both definitely convey different messages when read with the rest of the poem. Thanks for sharing!

[Scarlett Wampus]

Originally Posted by Sunstone

I wasn't aware I had used adolescent slang for an erection, but I'm glad you fainted anyway. Those silly adolescents stole my poetry even before I knew enough to steal it back from them, dang it!

Since I have a Freudian eye I spotted it Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar but to pitch tent by a rushing stream! OOOH NO!

I liked the sense of dynamic movement and exploration in this one. Associations with natural beauty always work for me too. I wonder though, how is such a person like a trail to the bears?

[Sunstone]

Originally Posted by Scarlett Wampus

Since I have a Freudian eye I spotted it Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar but to pitch tent by a rushing stream! OOOH NO!

I'm certainly can't argue with you. The association is perfectly legitimate eventhough I didn't consciously make it while writing out the poem. The images in all my poems, and often the word choices themselves, are typically intuitive: They bubble up from who knows where. Ironically, I'm sometimes the last to see an obvious association.

The only thing I will say about the image is that I believe both a sexual and a non sexual interpretation are equally valid. It's neither one nor the other, but both.

I liked the sense of dynamic movement and exploration in this one. Associations with natural beauty always work for me too.

Thank you, Scarlett! You might be interested to know that both of the women the poem is dedicated to are nature enthusiasts. For instance: I can hardly recall a day I've seen Becky in casual clothing without her wearing boots suited to hiking, although I'm sure she does wear other foot garb at times. She's just as much at home in a wilderness campsite as I am in my living room. So, the association of natural beauty to her is a very easy one to make.

I wonder though, how is such a person like a trail to the bears?

That's a very good question. Some years ago, Becky introduced me to one of my favorite hikes, a wilderness area that begins about 15 miles South of me called Aiken Canyon. There are two main trails through it. The first makes a big loop so that you come out where you started. The second branches off the first and runs West into the Rocky Mountains.

At the trail head is a chalk board where hikers will leave useful notes for those who come after them. One day, I was preparing to hike the main loop when I noticed someone had left a note of spotting a bear a mile or so down the West trail.

There are thousands of bears still left in Colorado, Scarlett, but it is rare for any one person to see one. They tend to go the other way when they hear the noisiest thing in the forest coming, that is a human. So, when I saw a bear had been spotted down the West trail only a couple hours before, I decided to have a look for myself.

I had never hiked the West trail before. And as I got a ways down it, things began to get stranger and stranger. For one thing, the sounds changed. The air was hushed. The tail entered a thicker forest. I felt there was an appreciable sense of mystery growing on that trail, something wild, perhaps even dangerous, but certainly mysterious.

It came time to turn back, and I did, and I saw no bears that day, but the image of that trail was in my mind when I wrote of those women as being "a trail to bears".

I don't know if that entirely explains the image, but it's perhaps a start.

[Sunstone]

Originally Posted by evearael

...the reference to "kept lawns" only magnify the feeling of reverence for untamed souls of these two women.

Thank you for your kindness in commenting on the poem, Evearael!

I am curious if you think, like I sometimes do, that the line about leaving the kept lawns behind is the most crucial single line in the poem?

[Beck63Don]

My Reply!
I'm not going on that west trail anymore! I've done the loop several times lately and I never venture west. Not after the mountain lion tracks in the snow and the bear dung and the bear scratchings on the trees and the sounds...yes...the sound changes as you head west on that trail. And about the government testing for possible weapons applications...Aunt Kathy says the missile interception system is operating with utmost efficiency! Do we really believe anything we hear? And most certainly only half of what we see. It's all in a state of change! Maybe I should head west on the trail. Maybe change has brought Koala's and Kangaroos!!!

[Sunstone]

Originally Posted by Beck63Don

My Reply!
I'm not going on that west trail anymore! I've done the loop several times lately and I never venture west. Not after the mountain lion tracks in the snow and the bear dung and the bear scratchings on the trees and the sounds...yes...the sound changes as you head west on that trail. And about the government testing for possible weapons applications...Aunt Kathy says the missile interception system is operating with utmost efficiency! Do we really believe anything we hear? And most certainly only half of what we see. It's all in a state of change! Maybe I should head west on the trail. Maybe change has brought Koala's and Kangaroos!!!

ROFL! Good point about things changing, but I still doubt very much that the West trail is now infested with Australian fauna rather than bears and mountain lions! When did you see the lion tracks, Beck? Last winter?

You mean they finally got the missle system working?? Everyone was saying it wouldn't work. I guess they were wrong.

Welcome to the Forum! I'm so happy you're here! And I'm so happy you're reading the poem co-dedicated to you!