Obsessed with my mistakes? (God)

[Scarlett Wampus]

As has been mentioned, confiding in friends and supportive family members is helpful. In my opinion Cognitive Behavioural Therapy may be a good thing to try for the kind of problem you describe too. Everyone has difficulties and gets stuck every so often, but you needn't struggle alone.

[ChrisP]

Originally Posted by Lemon

I'm a normal teen who often makes mistakes, and usually becomes embarrassed when I do make these mistakes. However, I've noticed that I have a problem with letting go of these moments, and I constantly think about them, making myself even more embarrassed as time goes by.

For example, about 5 months ago I screwed up while interviewing someone for my school newspaper. They ended up critisizing me to my teacher, who in return yelled at me. All these months later I can't get over it, in my head I'm always thinking, "They're probably thinking about me as that idiotic girl,how could I have been so stupid" Which then triggers off my mind to remember all the other times (over the years) when I have screwed up.

I become so embarrassed just thinking of these things, and I know it lowers my self-esteem. I feel like it's a way for my mind to torture me, and once I think about one moment I can't stop thinking about it for hours. I even wrote this tonight because an hour ago I remembered the moment I wrote about above. I just wish I could be like any other person and learn from my mistakes, instead of punishing myself for them. I have no idea if this is something that can be solved by therapy, or if I'm just being ridiculous, or if anyone else in the world even does this. I just wish it was something I could stop myself from doing.

Don't worry, you'll grow out of it. I went through the same thing for a long time. It's a self-confidence thing. There's nothing you can do except learn how to have faith in yourself and your abilities. This doesn't come from trying, it comes from believing. Get into something outdoorsy and extreme like rock climbing, something that's so physically far outside your comfort zone it scares you, and push yourself until you succeed (because you will).

Human beings are amazing creatures. All of us .

[michel]

Originally Posted by ChrisP

Don't worry, you'll grow out of it. I went through the same thing for a long time. It's a self-confidence thing. There's nothing you can do except learn how to have faith in yourself and your abilities. This doesn't come from trying, it comes from believing. Get into something outdoorsy and extreme like rock climbing, something that's so physically far outside your comfort zone it scares you, and push yourself until you succeed (because you will).

Human beings are amazing creatures. All of us .

With the greatest of respect Chris, even if you are right, I don't think what you have said is going to make lemon feel much of a 'buzz'.

I think what she is looking for is, like all of us do, a 'quick fix'. Of course, we all know that doesn't often work out in practice, but therapy could help shorten the time for her to develop some self worth.

Get into something outdoorsy and extreme like rock climbing, something that's so physically far outside your comfort zone it scares you, and push yourself until you succeed (because you will).

You see, if you said that to me, I would immediately feel even more depressed; a) because I am physically disabled (to some extent), and b) because I know (from past experience) that that would only make me feel more of a recluse and I would lose what little self esteem I have. You have to be very careful when making suggestions, although conversely, your advice is possibly just what Lemon needs.

Counselling is about making suggestions (as much of a variety as possible) - not pointing people in a certain direction (unless you think that one can do no harm - and I think a visit to a doctor can never hurt).

Hope I haven't upset you, that wasn't my intention......

[ChrisP]

Originally Posted by michel

With the greatest of respect Chris, even if you are right, I don't think what you have said is going to make lemon feel much of a 'buzz'.

I think what she is looking for is, like all of us do, a 'quick fix'. Of course, we all know that doesn't often work out in practice, but therapy could help shorten the time for her to develop some self worth.


You see, if you said that to me, I would immediately feel even more depressed; a) because I am physically disabled (to some extent), and b) because I know (from past experience) that that would only make me feel more of a recluse and I would lose what little self esteem I have. You have to be very careful when making suggestions, although conversely, your advice is possibly just what Lemon needs.

Counselling is about making suggestions (as much of a variety as possible) - not pointing people in a certain direction (unless you think that one can do no harm - and I think a visit to a doctor can never hurt).

Hope I haven't upset you, that wasn't my intention......

I see your point. I'm fairly able bodied (6 foot 4 100 kg (220lb) and not much of that fat.) as is nearly everyone I know. I forget not everyone is so fortunate and I apologise.

My point was to push yourself to do something you do not think you can do. Once you realise there is nothing you CAN'T do (or to be more positive: You can do anything) your confidence grows and you stop questioning yourself. I spent far too much of my life questioning myself, and I don't like to see others hurting themselves doing the same thing. Question your reality, not yourself. Oftentimes the hurtful things others have said to us create our reality, and I think people need to be more aware of that when speaking. Particularly to teenagers and those that are obviously self conscious (such as me and you mich ).

Doing things that you think you can't and succeeding is the best kind of therapy there is.

[Fluffy]

I feel the same way about mistakes I made as far back as when I was 6 or 7. It can be very embarassing, very frustrating because I wish I could have acted differently but am now unable and the strength of these emotions never seem to fade each time I am reminded of them.

It is very irritating and disconcerting... I wish I could just forget such memories so I no longer had to have them come back and haunt me especially since they were over such trivial things.

I wish I could offer you some help or advice, Lemon, but I haven't found any way to deal with it, myself . Just thought you might find it helpful to know that you aren't the only one who feels like that.

[ChrisP]

Originally Posted by Fluffy

I feel the same way about mistakes I made as far back as when I was 6 or 7. It can be very embarassing, very frustrating because I wish I could have acted differently but am now unable and the strength of these emotions never seem to fade each time I am reminded of them.

It is very irritating and disconcerting... I wish I could just forget such memories so I no longer had to have them come back and haunt me especially since they were over such trivial things.

I wish I could offer you some help or advice, Lemon, but I haven't found any way to deal with it, myself . Just thought you might find it helpful to know that you aren't the only one who feels like that.

Hahah just went to that personality test thing on your Journal

Paranoid: Very Highclick for info
Schizoid: Moderateclick for info
Schizotypal: Very Highclick for info
Antisocial: Moderateclick for info
Borderline: Lowclick for info
Histrionic: Moderateclick for info
Narcissistic:Highclick for info
Avoidant:Very Highclick for info
Dependent: Moderateclick for info
Obsessive-Compulsive: Lowclick for info

Oh Dear. . . well at least I'm not compulsive

[Fluffy]

Lol yeah everyone gets really high results . Either this is an indication of how screwed up everyone is or that the test is rather sensitive .

[ChrisP]

Originally Posted by Fluffy

Lol yeah everyone gets really high results . Either this is an indication of how screwed up everyone is or that the test is rather sensitive .

Change the Name to "make yourself neurotic in 5 minutes." the easy way to commitment.