Making Judgements............. (Earth, point of view)

[michel]

I suddenly found myself using the same argument in a couple of threads........maybe even three. I guess this is a concept that is close to my heart, and (I assume) that not many think as I do.

A short story, as an example;

A young woman in a wheelchair appeared at a chat show (accompanied by her parents). She had no control whatsoever of any part of her body except for her eyelids.....

She had been declared brain stem dead sometime back, and the doctors had a aproached the parents with a request to 'switch the machine off'.

One of her parents agreed, but the other refused to accept it, therefore, this young lady had been kept artificially alive for many years.

One day, one of the doctors thought he saw an eyelid flicker.........

To cut the story short, the girl was completely 'compos mentis', and totally without any control of any muscle in her body with the exception of her eyelids. Various tests were conducted, and the doctors finally were satisfied that she could communicate her feelings; one blink for "yes", and two for "no".

Imagine this girl, expressionless, strapped into a wheelchair being interviewed by the chat show host; "Are you sorry that the machine that was keeping you alive was not switched off ?" she was asked....... Two blinks (somehow, it 'looked like the blinks were very definite - that sounds strange, I guess, but many took it that way).

"Are you happy ?" she was later asked; One blink..............

I went away with that scene, unable to reconcile it. How on Earth could that woman be happy; how dare I be suffering from depression ? That week I went to my 'one to one' with the psychologist with a very heavy heart, feeling atrociously worthless, and guilty at what I had seen, when I compared myself to the woman.

I told the psychologist the story; he laughed at me. "Why was she happy ?" He asked me. "I can't for a moment imagine why" I replied.

His reply ? "what are her needs in life ?" He asked; "Being loved, cared for, fed and kept warm, and entertained... she is getting all of that..........What are your needs? " (I won't go into that), but were my needs in life being met ? Of course not..that is why I am a depressive.

You see the point I am trying to make is that everything can only be measured compared to a 'norm'. Are there any norms ? No. Think about it, what you call 'normal' (whoever is reading this) might not be what I (or others) consider normal..........

Frames of reference. That is the rule against which we gauge, we judge others. What frame of reference (most of us)? Ourselves!!

That means that our judgement is impaired.

Unless you think differently........
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[egroen]

I think you illustrated two great points: Everyone has a right to feel disappointed or depressed with what they view as their own failures or roadblocks in life, there is not one universal standard to which we must all measure ourselves to.

At the same time, no matter what, I think we all have reason to be thankful and appreciative of our own lives.

Small things tend to bog me down from time to time and I have consciously been trying to think at least one positive thought or something I have to be thankful for every time I find myself feeling down or focusing on the negative. Kind of cheesey, but I do think it serves to give me balance and a way of stepping outside of my own point of view from time to time.

Great post!

-Erin