Redneck pick-up lines (grace, faith, grace, muslim)

[mostly harmless]

Redneck pick-up lines



1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea .
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree and I were a Squirrel,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

[ayani]

oh, dear. i've actually heard a couple of these! >_<

[Sunstone]

Dang it, Candi, if you're going to post my lines for everyone to see, then I'm going to quit hitting on you!

[mostly harmless]

Originally Posted by Sunstone

Dang it, Candi, if you're going to post my lines for everyone to see, then I'm going to quit hitting on you!

Just wanted to make sure everyone knows what to watch out for...

[ayani]

actually, my dialogues go like this...

"you a nun?"

"no, sir"

"you some kinda muslim?"

"no, not quite. <explaination of faith and the scarf>"

"huh. you wanna ****?"

"no, thank you." *polite smile*

every. dang. time.

[Djamila]

Hahaha, Gracie.

I rarely get hit on by men I don't know, because I wear a wedding ring. But men both my husband and I know are always hitting on me, especially if he's around to witness it. lol

"How's that husband of yours treating you, slatka mala (little sweet thing)?"
"Well enough, all things considered."
"Well, you know who to call if he ever runs out of your graces."
"The mafia?"
"Now, I'm being kind and generous. There's no justification for starting a jihad, I'm just trying to make sure a lady such as yourself gets what she deserves."
"*Groan*"

And then they all "OH!" like there was a crash on the race track or something. Makes me feel like a dancing monkey in heels. lol

[Shadow Wolf]

All I can think of the law for whatever state that makes it forbidden to shoot a gun when your wife has an orgasm. What would a pick up line revolving around that sound like?

[equus somnium]

o. m. g.

[ayani]

Mila- hahaha! oh, wait. i have to post these!

Top 25 Islamic Pick-up Lines (some edited...)

1. "OH MY GOSH! I just saw part of your hair, now you're obliged to marry me."

2. "I'd like to be more than just your brother in Islam."

4."Will my platinum VISA cover your dowry?"

5."You can't play basketball with a jilbab on, marry me, and we will go one-on-one our entire life."

6."Muslims are supposed to have many children, and I am willing to do my part..."

7."Assalamualaikum, so what time does a Hoor Al-3ayn like you have to be back in Jannah?"

9. Do you believe in the hereafter? Oh you do? Then you know what I'm hereafter.

10. Lets get married so I don’t have to lower my gaze every time you walk in the room

11. I've had to fast every day since the day that I first saw you.

12. Do you work for the FBI ? Because you've just abducted my heart.

14. Would you like to help me wake up for Fajr?

15. Are you a Shiite? Because when I saw you, I said to myself, "She aiight".

16. Do you wanna date? I bought a box full when I went to Madinah.

19. I need to break my fast. Can I have a date?

23. "*guy looks under girls hijab* "sorry, i was looking for the made in jannah tag"

24. "After seeing you, the first thing I said was Mashallah. The next was Inshallah!"

25. "Are those legs halal?"

[Tiberius]

Redneck pickup line.

"Heya, good lookin'. How'd yer like ter be me girlfriend as well as me sister... and aunt?"