Lightbulb Jokes (priests, evolution, catholic, verse, Orthodox)

[Bishka]

Q: How many existentialists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.





Q: How many Welsh mothers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: "Don't worry dearie, I'll just sit here in the dark, alone."





Q: How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.





Q: How many Greek Orthodox priests does it take to change a light bulb?
A: What do you mean, "change"!?





Q: How many Spaniards does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Juan.





Q: How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb?
A: A tree in a golden forest.





Q: How many postmodernists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: In a Derridaist reading, wherein light is a social construct, there is a dialectic between Darkness as a reality and reality as a mode.





Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fish.

[angellous_evangellous]

When two people say something stupid I say, "Maybe someday you two can get together and change a lightbulb."

So far no one laughs, but I love it!

[Rejected]

How many Irish Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the light bulb, and one to drink 'til the room spins.

[Mestemia]

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

[Tiberius]

How many quantum physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the light bulb, the other to rotate the universe around him.

[SoyLeche]

Originally Posted by Tiberius

How many quantum physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the light bulb, the other to rotate the universe around him.

[serious note] Isn't quantum physics about very tiny particles? How would they rotate the universe? [/serious note]

[ayani]

Originally Posted by Mestemia

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

ahaha!

how many old catholic ladies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

two: one to screw in the light bulb, and one to stand below nervously, dilligently fingering an acient little rosary from the old country.

[Green Gaia]

You can't beat UUs for lightbulb jokes, or just poking fun at ourselves in general. I'll only post one though:

How many Unitarian Universalists does it take to change a lightbulb?

We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found light bulbs work for you, that's fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb, and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service. At this time we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

[standing_alone]

Originally Posted by Maize

You can't beat UUs for lightbulb jokes, or just poking fun at ourselves in general. I'll only post one though:

How many Unitarian Universalists does it take to change a lightbulb?

We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found light bulbs work for you, that's fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb, and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service. At this time we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

I've seen these lightbulb jokes so many times, but this UU one cracks me up everytime without fail.