Womenisms. (marriage)

[Circle_One]

This is an email an old teacher of mine send me and it gave me a good giggle so I thought I'd share.
BEHIND EVERY
SUCCESSFUL WOMAN
IS HERSELF
OH MY GOD,
I THINK I'M BECOMING
THE MAN I WANTED
TO MARRY!
GINGER ROGERS DID EVERYTHING
FRED ASTAIRE DID,
BUT SHE DID IT BACKWARDS
AND IN HIGH HEELS
A WOMAN IS LIKE A TEA BAG...
YOU DON'T KNOW HOW STRONG
SHE IS UNTIL YOU PUT HER
IN HOT WATER
I HAVE YET TO HEAR A MAN
ASK FOR ADVICE ON HOW
TO COMBINE MARRIAGE
AND A CAREER
SO MANY MEN,
SO FEW WHO CAN
AFFORD ME
COFFEE, CHOCOLATE, MEN.
SOME THINGS ARE JUST
BETTER RICH
DON'T TREAT ME ANY
DIFFERENTLY
THAN YOU WOULD
THE QUEEN
I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN
And I HAVE A GUN
WARNING: I HAVE AN ATTITUDE
AND I KNOW HOW
TO USE IT
OF COURSE I DON'T LOOK BUSY...
I DID IT RIGHT
THE FIRST TIME
DO NOT START WITH ME.
YOU WILL NOT WIN
ALL STRESSED OUT
AND NO ONE
TO CHOKE

DON'T UPSET ME!
I'M RUNNING OUT OF PLACES
TO HIDE THE BODIES

And last but not least:

IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED,
SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN