Bald humor (hell, America)

[Bright-ness' Shadow]

http://www.unwind.com/jokes-funnies/...hairloss.shtml

Not satisfied with the results he got from his family doctor, a balding man sought out an alternative treatment for his hair loss. A friend referred him to a scientist who had been testing a chemical that showed great promise.

Within a week after taking the recommended dosage, a heavy growth of hair appeared on the bald man's scalp. He was very happy at first, but soon became alarmed when hair began to grow uncontrollably all over his body.

After two weeks, he returned to see the scientist. "What the hell did you give me?" he demanded.

"It was DNA from a Woolly Mammoth."

"Aha!" exclaimed the man. "That would explain the size of my testicles!"

20 of 120 available
http://www.keepersoflists.org/index....09-11;dir=prev

1 Top of your head gets cold in winter
2 Your part keeps getting wider...and wider.
3 Eh, ........ HELLO! YOUR HAIR IS FALLING OUT!!!!!!!!
4 "I'm not bald, it's the top of my head getting bigger!!!!!"
5 Boss says "lets send one of the younger guys on the recruiting trip this year"
6 Can't conceal the horns anymore...
7 I think we just found out why the Keepers have hoods!
8 It's been years since anyone asked, "Have you changed your hair?"
9 People start calling you "Mr.Clean".
10 The barber starts charging you less for hair-cuts
11 The sun seems to be getting hotter
12 When David Letterman starts making bald jokes about YOU
13 You develop a habit of sucking on lollipops and saying "Who loves ya', baby"
14 You get more coupons for Rogaine than you get America On-Line disks.
15 You have no hair
16 You no longer have a dandruff problem
17 You refer to it as a "Haircut with a hole in it".
18 you start putting suntan oil on your scalp
19 You're still using the same bottle of shampoo after two years...
20 Your forhead seems to be growing

[Lady Crimson]

haha...I love them! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah...etc.

[EnhancedSpirit]

The boss of a big company who needed to call one of his employees about an
urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the employee's home
phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper, "Hello."

"Is your daddy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with him?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your
Mommy
there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss
asked, "Is anybody else there?"

"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss
asked,
"May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy," whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a
helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss then asked, "What is
that noise?"

"A hello-copper," answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just
landed
the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss
asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle,
"Me.