A very disturbing connection (punishment, Article)

[Mercy Not Sacrifice]

Wow--this thread took quite a different direction than what I expected.

But yeah, there's growing evidence that spanking a child's bottom is an inherent sexual violation. And yes, children possess more complete sexuality workings than some have realised. Unfortunately, child molesters know this all too well.

So was anyone completely disengaged by the prospect that this article essentially equates spanking to molestation? Is there any research out there that clearly states that a child's psyche will always know the difference?

[Guitar's Cry]

Originally Posted by Ðanisty

Sadomasochism is not inherently self-destructive and certainly not destructive to those who aren't involved.

I agree.

[Ðanisty]

I think people who propose that spanking a child is too sexual are thinking much too much about a child's sexuality. In other words, what kind of person would sit around and think about whether spanking arouses children? I was spanked a number of times as a child and I never felt anything beyond sadness for disappointing my parents. If I wasn't turned on, I have a hard time imagining who would be because I was aware of my sexuality by the time I could walk. Just what kind of spankings are these anyway? Are we sure that the person spanking is doing it right? If a child is turned on by a spanking, I'm more concerned about the parents' technique (and maybe even their own subconscious intentions) than the act of spanking itself.

[jmaster78]

Originally Posted by evearael

I orgasmed quite regularly from at least second grade on. I don't recall any sorts of... confusion from being spanked as a child, but I was only spanked twice. I was more humiliated than anything.

my parents were firm believers in spanking, and because of the rebelious attitude i had as a child, i recieved many a smack on the butt, can't ever recall being turned on by it, just terrified to do whatever i did wrong again, much as i hated it then, i'm glad my parents did it otherwise i would probably be in prison now. if some people got a kick out of it as a child then lucky them, all i got was respect for the rules and a very sore ***!

[MaddLlama]

Originally Posted by Ðanisty

I totally disagree with this entire premise. Sadomasochism is not inherently self-destructive and certainly not destructive to those who aren't involved.

Exactly.
And, what about children who were never spanked and when they become adults are attracted to this sort of sexual behavior?
Part of what makes spanking erotic for some adults isn't simply the nerve endings in the buttocks, it is the adults ability to eroticize the sensation. Not every adult enjoys being spanked in a sexual manner. Some that I know would be downright horrified by the idea. If the premise is that any sort of touch to the buttocks is erotic, then why aren't all adults into it?

This whole idea doesn't make much sense to me, and I agree that it is thinking about the issue too much. I don't think that children have the mental ability to turn a spanking into an erotic feeling. I dsicovered my sexuality at a young age as well, and I didn't even consider this as a possiblity until only a few years ago.

[MaddLlama]

Originally Posted by Mercy Not Sacrifice

So was anyone completely disengaged by the prospect that this article essentially equates spanking to molestation? Is there any research out there that clearly states that a child's psyche will always know the difference?

He's postulating a theory, but not really doing anything more than that. I read rationalizations, possible explanations and things that made it seem like the connection was a commonsense idea, however, nowhere did I find anything relating to a study about children and sexuality that could even begin to substantiate the argument.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think it's a dumb idea, I just think that it missed the mark - it's definately something that could/should be studied and testing to see if this is true. Without really looking at the response to spanking in children themselves from all angles, coming to any sort of conclusion is just making assumptions.

[jamaesi]

Exactly.
And, what about children who were never spanked and when they become adults are attracted to this sort of sexual behavior?
Part of what makes spanking erotic for some adults isn't simply the nerve endings in the buttocks, it is the adults ability to eroticize the sensation. Not every adult enjoys being spanked in a sexual manner. Some that I know would be downright horrified by the idea. If the premise is that any sort of touch to the buttocks is erotic, then why aren't all adults into it?

Name just one sexual act or technique that ALL adults are into and I'll bake cookies (or whatever you like ) and mail them to you.

[Noirhaired]

When I was spanked as a child, including my siblings, friends, and relatives, we all cried big time! No way did we think it was anywhere near pleasurable...and orgasms? We were all too busy nursing the welts on our bottoms to even feel anything else. Don't know what that author is thinking.

Though, I definately do think that there is a point to spanking being seen as sexual abuse...it's close to the genital area, but I think that the context shouldn't be ignored: for the most part, when children are spanked, it's for punishment purposes. Not saying that pedophiles haven't tried using that themselves....

[PureX]

Very little about we human beings is a "one-size-fits-all" proposition. It's clear that there is enough anecdotal evidence to substantiate this thesis at least for some number of children. So the question isn't 'if', but how many and what is the payoff for continuing the practice, anyway.