The young ones chance (choices, choice, experience, heaven)

tcprowling · #1 08-30-2006, 04:17 PM

It must seem to teenagers or the younger generation that the "Oldies" are forever finding fault with them, so here YOUR chance, Let's give the "Young'uns" a go.... to the younger members give us a list of up to 5 things where you feel the older generation, be they parents, teachers or those in authority, are at fault, Even if it is only a " wish list"

tcprowling · #2 09-02-2006, 08:20 AM

This is like my kids were, They would walk around looking lost and I would say " What's Up?"
answer "Nothing!
me: well something thing's wrong?
Them:" I'm bored"
Well what do you want to do?
" I don't know!"
You have the chance to speak, take it, Heaven knows us oldies have picked fault with the young uns enough.

michel · #3 09-02-2006, 08:57 AM

I'm not sure which side of the fence I'm on.................

tcprowling · #4 09-02-2006, 07:12 PM

I guess this thread comes down to the way our kids see our actions
Parents place a curfew on their kids and want to know where they are and who they are with at all times. They do this in the name of protecting ther children.
However teenagers see it as being restrictive and " as being treated "like a child". Some even go so far as to put forward the point as the parents not trusting their children.

Lindsey-Loo · #5 09-02-2006, 07:18 PM

1. My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
3. Teachers give extra homework just because they've been having a bad day.
4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

tcprowling · #6 09-02-2006, 07:34 PM

Do you feel that parents re act like this based on what they did as teenagers or as an over reaction to the perception that " to day is a much more dangerous place then it was in their day?

tcprowling · #7 09-02-2006, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anade

1. My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
3. Teachers give extra homework just because they've been having a bad day.
4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

Yep Anade I guess as a parent, I'd have to put my hand up to being guilty to some of these.
My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
we were pretty tolerant of my girls' friends, as most of them spent a lot of time in our house they were viewed as more of an extention of the family
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
Yeppers! guilty as charged. But i feel in my case I had mitergating circumstances LOL I felt the girls were much more better then their marks/grades indicated. My youngest was brilliant in her junior grades, but went into her " Rebellious stage" in the second year of high school, and her grade fell. I was continiously on her back. It wasn't til I found some old school reports of my own that i realised I'd done exactly the same at school.
Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
Yep sort of guilty! During their teen years We had a lot going on in our lives, some of it normal living some of it self destructive. However, we did encourage Open and frank discussions and in Life's lessons we like to think that we were sucessful, however, there were times when I feel we, thier parents didn't appreciate that what we though as trivial was really important to them.
They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute
This one can be a curly one with me! It's not that I didn't trust them, I felt that they didn't have the experience in life to deal with some certian situations I grew up bundling from pitfall to pitfall and by the time i was 21 I'd seen more of life then most people see in thier entire lifetime ( I am not bragging there just stating a fact) and it was my intention to to do my best so that they wouldn't make the same mistakes as I did.

PetShopBoy88 · #8 09-02-2006, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anade

4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

Yeah...

Booko · #9 09-02-2006, 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tcprowling

I guess this thread comes down to the way our kids see our actions
Parents place a curfew on their kids and want to know where they are and who they are with at all times. They do this in the name of protecting ther children.
However teenagers see it as being restrictive and " as being treated "like a child". Some even go so far as to put forward the point as the parents not trusting their children.

I have always asked my kids to let me know where they are so that I am not worried, and I tell them where I am so they don't worry. My daughter messed up once, and I was very worried. I accidentally on purpose was not there after school a week later. The car was home, and they couldn't find me anywhere, and they were scared out of their minds. So they got the lesson in consideration really really fast, and haven't chafed against it, because I always show consideration for them also.

It isn't entirely about protection.

My son was upset once because he had to ride bikes on Jekyll Island with his sister when he wanted to stay home and do his own thing.

I had him call my business partner/friend and had her explain about how things are different for girls, and how the fact that she had no male to protect her left her open for three incidents of rape.

He never complained about that again either.

They get snarky about having their videogames interrupted by real life sometimes, but if it's something not urgent I stick a post it on the side of the monitor -- showing respect for their time. And if it's urgent, I make that clear, but I keep that to a minimum.

And there have been a few times when I demonstrated what it was like when they needed something from me right away, but I was "too busy" doing something fun.

If the kids see our actions from their pov, it looks very different. When they see how the shoe pinches their toes when it's on their foot, they get over the complaining pretty quickly.

Such a sneaky, devilish

mom I am....