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  #11  
Old 07-24-2006, 03:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by evearael
I would do everything in my power to protect the victim. Obviously I didn't know my 'friend' as well as I thought I did.
Or did you? I have been the recipient of a "sexual harrassment" suit that was brought on because I rejected her advances. I was out of work for over a month (unpaid at first) because of this. However, when she threatened my supervisor with the same thing that happened to me, he realised that it was all fabricated.

The only thing to do is to recuse yourself and stay FRIENDS with your friends until they are proven guilty. I can't say that I ever forgave that manager completely. He did me right be making sure I was paid for the time I lost, and he must have apologised a hundred times for not trusting in his opinion of me. Too many emotions to occlude your rational thought process.
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  #12  
Old 07-24-2006, 10:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jamaesi



It wasn't.
Aww, come on. Lighten up why don't you.

“It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously.” Oscar Wilde



“Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.” Mark Twain

"Humor is just another defense against the universe." Mel Brooks

"When humor goes, there goes civilization." Erma Bombeck


Cheers,
-- Happier
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  #13  
Old 07-24-2006, 11:59 PM
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I don't find talk of murdering sexual assault victims funny.

Dear me, I must have no sense of humour.



Trust me, I can laugh at myself. I don't like laughing at other's misfortunes.


Quote:
Or did you? I have been the recipient of a "sexual harrassment" suit that was brought on because I rejected her advances. I was out of work for over a month (unpaid at first) because of this. However, when she threatened my supervisor with the same thing that happened to me, he realised that it was all fabricated.

The only thing to do is to recuse yourself and stay FRIENDS with your friends until they are proven guilty. I can't say that I ever forgave that manager completely. He did me right be making sure I was paid for the time I lost, and he must have apologised a hundred times for not trusting in his opinion of me. Too many emotions to occlude your rational thought process.
If there was proof that he did sexually assault someone, then I would have to do everything in my power to make sure he was brough to justice.

I am very sorry for what happened to you. That's just terrible.

False claims of sexual assault (and they are so few compared to the actual cases of it, reported or not) make it so much harder for the victims of sexual assault and rape to find justice.
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  #14  
Old 07-25-2006, 09:18 AM
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Quote:
Or did you? I have been the recipient of a "sexual harrassment" suit that was brought on because I rejected her advances. I was out of work for over a month (unpaid at first) because of this. However, when she threatened my supervisor with the same thing that happened to me, he realised that it was all fabricated.

The only thing to do is to recuse yourself and stay FRIENDS with your friends until they are proven guilty. I can't say that I ever forgave that manager completely. He did me right be making sure I was paid for the time I lost, and he must have apologised a hundred times for not trusting in his opinion of me. Too many emotions to occlude your rational thought process.
That is unfortunate, however in this example, the original post stated I had already investigated it and found the claim to be well founded. I would not jump to conclusions if I had no data to work with.
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  #15  
Old 07-25-2006, 09:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tcprowling
You are the office supervisior, You are very well like all round you get on Good with your workers and management, especially the office manager, with whom you not only share a good working relationship, but both your familys are pretty well knitted outside the office. The office Manager also just happens to be your immediate superior. On this day you are approached by one of the office staff with a complaint that she is being sexually harassed by the office manager, on investigation you find that her claims seem pretty well founded.
What do you do? how would you handle it?
I think others have said it, but I would have to confront him and make sure he goes to the "higher level" (the is one for most of us mortals, except for Bush and Blair)
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  #16  
Old 07-25-2006, 11:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by evearael
That is unfortunate, however in this example, the original post stated I had already investigated it and found the claim to be well founded. I would not jump to conclusions if I had no data to work with.
That's the crux of the whole thing... why would you consider yourself to be unbiased given your relationship with your friend? Anger alone could blind you to the truth as it did with my supervisor. When he finally realised the ulterior motive of my accuser, he was able to go back and truly evaluate the evidence. If she had not shown her true colors to him, I would have lost my career at the time.

Discretion is the better part of valor. Too often we allow our feelings to enter into our decision making process. Since we can not eliminate this, we need to learn to pass these decisions on to those who are unencumbered by such emotions.
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Last edited by NetDoc; 07-25-2006 at 11:40 AM.
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  #17  
Old 07-26-2006, 06:33 PM
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Default my Take on this

First
YOU ARE THE OFFICE SUPERVISOR. You are junior management IMO, there is noway you would be allowed to handle something as serious as sexual harassment. In fact these days, in your employment contract you would have specific directives on who to refer such matters.
Secondly
YOU INVESTIGATED AND found.... . What you probably found was yourself " On the mat" for exceeding your authority and probably jeopardising further investigations into the matter. In fact unless you witnessed an actual incident of harassment then anything you had to contribute would be' Heresay"
Ok this is how I think i would handle the matter;
As soon as the " victim" mentioned the term " sexual harassment" I'd stop them, Preferablly before any names were mentioned, I'd say " Hold it! right there! this is a very serious matter, it is beyond my authority to handle this! we need to get you to the approicate Person". If the office manager was mentioned I would further Tell the " Victim" that for me to be seen handling it would/ could be seen as a conflict of interest" In light of my friendship with the office manager. Then while He / she ( Victim ) was still with me I would arrange an immediate Interview with that approicate person. I would escot the victim to that approicate person's office and imform them " So and so here has a very serious matter I think you should hear". END of my involvement!!!!!!!! At no time would I leave the " Victim" alone, until they were with the right person. this , if only to assure them that i wasn't dismissing their report and in light that the whole office knowing, my relationship with the office manager, That I had done the right thing by the " Victim"
Ok as for my relationship with the office manager, I don't think I would say anything. In fact I am pretty sure that I would have been warned by senior management or the S/H officer that this matter was not to be discussed with anybody, under threat of servere disciplinary action.
As for the moral issue re our friendship i would like to think that i would adopt the " innocent til proven guilty" attitude
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  #18  
Old 07-27-2006, 08:44 AM
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TCProwling did a much better job of explaining how to handle this scenario (Frubals on your head!) than I did... and I only disagree about not telling the friend. There is no way that I would let them be blindsided by this. Not after what I went through. They have a right to defend themselves UNTIL they are proven guilty.
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