Chroodianism IS right :) (hell, eternity, Almighty, faith, religions)

[Buttons*]

(continued) On Hell...

We have our own version of Hell... but we say it in the context of "the flames of Chapultapec and Guadalajara" ... two names, one hell, got it?

We have a heaven, and it is called "aaaaahhhhh, ooooohhh" Anything that makes you experience these noises brings you THAT much closer to "heaven" so rejoyce!!! You get there by following the rules of the Almighty Poowawa, and pledging our alliegence to Choodle and its word! If you're basically good, you'll also go to "aaaaaahhhhh, oooohhh" because Choodle is fair!

[Buttons*]

The Book of Choodle is an extremely exclusive book.

Although I have posted the 17 signs of the end of the world, this, in no way, shape or form is the entire Bible! I shall begin translating the sacred texts as they come to me.

The first part that has come to me are the 10,000 steps to enlightenment!!! (*gasp* 10,000?) Yes......













..... unfortunatley, only 20 have survived.... *looks at dog chewing on holy book* So yes, surely 20 is all we need to get to Choodianists Aaaaaaaah, oooooohhh! I shall begin translations as soon as i've had my nap.... Choodle only works on those well rested!
__________________

[Buttons*]

1) The first step to becoming a true Choodianist and to achieve aaaaahhhh,ooooohhh enlightenment goes as follows: You must climb up and down 1000 steps of doom three times.
http://www.nbhtravel.com/Bonaire/100...ps%20steps.jpg

This is the exercise needed to realize that your body is terminal! All who complete this step with true faith shall experience 'uuuuugh ooouch' feelings, but these are just a first 'step'."

[Buttons*]

The Choodianists Bible

I decided that this book is much too difficult to re-post here, so by the power of Choodle in me, here is your link to the truth!

[YmirGF]

*enters the thread grinning broadly with cupcakes smeared on his manly chest*

Greetings again Almighty Poowawa [may cupcakes aways fill your larder]
Verily, I have been a smitten Choodianist since the run in with Buttercup [praised be her freshly iced cupcakes] and your holy self [may cupcakes aways fill your larder] at the world famous egg tossing event. Surely that heady time must put a smile on your [may cupcakes aways fill your larder] face and a fresh cupcake in your [may cupcakes aways fill your larder] wee mits.

Great Poowawa, I have a deep personal problem. Dare I trouble you with it? You see, there is a sheep in my back yard that ummmm... likes to ummmm... "Oh my Lord Choodle, I am so weak that I cannot resist the sweet smell of her lovely wool. I have tried in vain to rise above these feeling but I just can't seem to help myself. Do you have any advice for me?

Your slave in icing,
Paul/YmirGF

PS: Thanks for those nifty velcro oven mits, although my sheep gets nervous whenever I put them on... omg... she is bah-ing.... please make this seductress stop tempting me... gotta run.

[Booko]

Originally Posted by Buttons*

It's never too late to become Choodianist... I believe there needs to be a revival! I'll repost the holy book!

Perhaps we should ask over in Site Feedback. We could have our own forum over in New Religious Movements.

Well... i sort of ate the t-shirt... i couldnt help it... when i see cupcake, i eat cupcake!

That explains it!

[Buttons*]

Originally Posted by Booko

Perhaps we should ask over in Site Feedback. We could have our own forum over in New Religious Movements.

I tried that before... I think it'll be more convincing if you ask

That explains it!

that's because the almighty poowawa has an explanation for all!

[Kungfuzed]

Do any of you believe that the Muffin Man will one day return to bake the earth into a giant boston cream donut? When will this be?

[Buttons*]

Originally Posted by Kungfuzed

Do any of you believe that the Muffin Man will one day return to bake the earth into a giant boston cream donut? When will this be?

No.... but I'd assume that it's coming before the flames of Chapultapec and Guadalajara swallow us! The time is near... repent

[rojse]

Originally Posted by Buttons*

Sorry to all the other "what if?" - ers... but Choodianism and it's fullness of cupcakes...well... takes the cake!

Our religion was THE fastest growing world religion: A record of 74 people in about 12 hours from the time the prophecies came to me - the Almighty Poowawa. I must say, any religion that grows THAT fast must be the truth. At teh end of the day... I really dont care how anyone would react/feel if Choodianism were right, because I know it's infallible! Come now, come with me and praise the holy hotdog of life!

.... references for Choodianism and all Choodianist related products are available in "new world religions" ENJOY!

Wow! That's a rate of 7400%! Who else can boast such a feat?

Considering that everyone tries to rank religion based on the amount of new converts, I would say that you make a convincing case for me to convert to Choodianism.

Please teach me all that I need to know to be a good Choodianist.