Mystery of Missing Mayans Solved (Sodom, Gomorrah, virgin, missionaries)

[xllb]

J. Rothdell Grape, P.H.D. candidate, has published a paper in the Spring, 2004 issue of The Christian Anthropologist Journal. His theory is likely to prick a lot of pride.

Mr. Grape is studying Central American Missions at Blake Bible College, in Lynchburg, Virginia. Grape credits the summer he spent building homes for missionaries in Cancun, Mexico, for his theory.

“I was at Carlos and Charlie’s having a pop. There were Mayan hieroglyphics on the menu.” Grape says.

“They got me thinking, and I knew God was telling me to get to the real Mayan ruins right away.”

When Grape examined the ancient marks that covered the stone monuments, he didn’t see what he was looking for right away. Grape knelt, facing away from the monument in case it was some kind of idol, and prayed for guidance.

“I’d been walking around the thing for about twenty minutes before the first hint hit me. Some of the markings clearly represented animals and people. A significant number of the people or animal drawings were in pairs.

“My thought process, which God was gently guiding, went kind of like this. That’s two dogs or wolves or something, doing something together. I wrote that down in my notebook. That there is two Mayan people standing on a wall. That one is a Mayan guy pointing a spear at another Mayan guy. And that one is two Mayans dancing.

“Right then God gave me the second clue.” It wasn’t just any two Mayans dancing. It was two ancient Mayan guys dancing. “

“I was really excited, because this is exactly what I was looking for to prove my theory, but my faith is small, so I asked God for one more sign. I knew that if my theory could be proven, we would defeat our homosexual opponents once and for all. Even if they come up with a gay gene, we will still be able to show that gays caused the downfall of the entire Mayan civilization, just as they had caused the downfall of Sodom and Gomorrah.

“I was looking for the third sign as I rushed to the men’s washroom, passing stone things that had the answer right there on them. I should have caught on right away but I really had to pee.

“I was standing at the urinal, thinking about the drawing of the Mayan guy poking a spear at the other Mayan guy. As I put myself away, I realized that the guy wasn’t poking the other guy with a spear.”

“I ran back out to the big old stone thing and my eyes were opened. What I’d thought was a spear was a penis. And the other guy didn’t look the least bit unhappy. They were having homosexual relations.

“The fourth and final sign sealed my mind on this one. The drawing that I’d first interpreted as two Mayan people standing on a wall, I’m now convinced are two gay guys getting married.”

Watch for “Mystery of Missing Mayans Solved” in the Spring, 2004 issue of The Christian Anthropologist Journal.

[RavenRose]

I am not sure if I should... let this stay here.

What do you all think?

[Gnosti Seauton]

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law

I think it's complete hog wash. 100% poo. It's completely based of some half cooked theory with no scientific data to back it up. Anyone can see anything if they're looking for it and it's apparent from this "paper" that this individual certainly was not pro-homosexuality and more than likely this person had probably been looking for a way lench homosexuals for a while (this pure specutaltion taken from my knowledge of psychology). This person evidentaly also has no knowledge of Mayan glyphs as is apparent

That’s two dogs or wolves or something, doing something together.

Thus furthering the basis of my theory. Just becuase this man has a "PhD" does not make him an expert on Mayan culture. There is no solid evidence to support theory. And it is theory based off of hate.

“I was really excited, because this is exactly what I was looking for to prove my theory, but my faith is small, so I asked God for one more sign. I knew that if my theory could be proven, we would defeat our homosexual opponents once and for all. Even if they come up with a gay gene, we will still be able to show that gays caused the downfall of the entire Mayan civilization, just as they had caused the downfall of Sodom and Gomorrah.

If I had a little less intellegence I would say "Look more reason for me not to be christian, look at all the hate that pours from them." But of course I know not all Christians have this mind set. But regadless my point is is
that this type stuff is very counter productive.

Love is the law, love under will

[Colin_Admin]

I dont belive this for one minutes. It sounds like some 12 year old trying to figure out if he is gay or not. He needed a sign from God and he found it in a Mayan Crest.

[RavenRose]

There have also been other theories. I mean... this is over the top. :P

[ErikaLee]

As silly as it is... and man is it silly.... there will be people that believe this and use it as examples.

One small step for that guy and one giant leap backwards for Christianity.

If the Church or some other Christian Scholars came out against that guy it would help, but that will never happen in my opinion.

EL

[Green Gaia]

Ah, more right-wing Christian homophobic rhetoric, "Gay are the downfall of civilizations".... just what the world needs.... what a bunch of bull... :roll:


BTW: I found nothing on a "Christian Anthropologist Journal" or a Mr. J. Rothdell Grape, P.H.D. candidate, they don't exist.

[ErikaLee]

Yeah, I did a search too. Though I am certain there is a Christian Archaeologist Society and I will keep looking...

But the only thing I found that referred to a Christian Anthropolist Journal and Mr. J. Rothdell Grape, P.H.D Candidate was the same article by XLLB on another website that I won't post here. And on that site, it listed the author of the article as one Rick Strongitharm.

I love the internet.

EL

[xllb]

I am the creator of J. Rothdell Grape, Blake Bible College and the oxymoronic Christian Anthropology Journal.

It is entirely fiction, silly fiction. My experience is that many Christians grasp at incredibly thin straws in an attempt to support their sad and often harmful dogma.

[RavenRose]

"My experience is that many Christians grasp at incredibly thin straws in an attempt to support their sad and often harmful dogma."

I haven't seen much like this article. Have you? There are legitimate Christians, yet also ones that will distort things : and as a hint we don't buy it either.