Giving and receiving (Buddhism, Christian, Christ, Buddhism, Zen)

[Somkid]

My practice has benefited from the gift of giving, anything from mindfulness to offering a small amount of money to someone who would otherwise suffer as an alternative. However, when it comes to giving things in the physical sense, I have come to realize that I do not usually want anything in return. This goes back to when I was a child, my family was Christian (well they said they were) but I did not like receiving things at Christmas and I especially hated Easter yet people insisted on giving me something, as I got older and gave gifts for any reason people insisted on giving something in return and I found this to be really annoying.

It seems like true kindness/compassion (rooted in the Dharma) comes down to treating others how you would like to be treated, but not necessarily expecting anything in return. Does that make any sense?

[koan]

In Zen and Buddhism generally, many people give gifts and donate do volunteer work etc. However, the majority of people expect to gain merit from such acts. Bodhidharma was asked by the Emperor," I have paid for the building of many Buddhist monestaries, how much merit have I earned?" Bodhidharma replied, "None". Why is this? Because when one gives, it should be as though one hasn't given anything? Often this is refered to as, No giver, no gift.

[vandervalley]

yup; if one makes a donation and expecting something in return then it's sort of like doing a business deal rather than a genuine donation

[zenzero]

Frined Somkid,
you write:

Giving and receiving
My practice has benefited from the gift of giving, anything from mindfulness to offering a small amount of money to someone who would otherwise suffer as an alternative. However, when it comes to giving things in the physical sense, I have come to realize that I do not usually want anything in return. This goes back to when I was a child, my family was Christian (well they said they were) but I did not like receiving things at Christmas and I especially hated Easter yet people insisted on giving me something, as I got older and gave gifts for any reason people insisted on giving something in return and I found this to be really annoying.
It seems like true kindness/compassion (rooted in the Dharma) comes down to treating others how you would like to be treated, but not necessarily expecting anything in return. Does that make any sense?

Like to state that it is your mind's perception that without receiving what you give the receiver might otherwise suffer. Anyone suffers due to his karama and it is not negeted by others karma.
Giving or receiving. Who is giving? Are you the giver? where did you get that what you give? were you born with it? do you own what you give? These are all illusions / mind play / maya. When we become only a conduit for things to happen like giving or taking then we are not personally involved is when real things happen.
friend Somkid, when someone gives anything one must accept it but finally one can always pass it to others if the need for it is not there.
Love & rgds

[michaelm]

Sometimes we should accept a gift in order to provide someone else with the opportunity to give. I realised this for myself when I went to Amavarati Buddhit Monastery in England. Every time I went I took food etc. On one ocassion I was running late so I didnt take anything. As the time came to eat, I felt uncomfortable taking without having given. I then realsied that is what the Buddhist monks have to do all the time. In order for someone to give, someone esle must receive.

The only important thing is that the giving and receiving is done in the right spirit.